If We Ever Meet Again
by Midnight-Gem94
Summary: 1918-Edward Masen and Isabella Swan are young and in love but they are cruelly ripped apart by a deadly pandemic. Present day- Isabella is the lost and lonely new girl in Forks but why does the mysterious Edward Cullen look so familiar? on temp hiatus.
1. Chapter 1

**This story is born from a random idea which I thought sounded very romantic...**

**Hope you like it!**

**Summary- 1918- Edward Masen and Isabella Swan were young and in love but they were cruelly ripped apart by a deadly pandemic. Present day- Isabella is the lost and lonely new girl in Forks but why does the mysterious Edward Cullen look so familiar? Twilight with a twist!**

**Prologue-**

They lay on their sides, facing one another. Their beds pushed as close as would be allowed, close enough to hold hands. Edward watched her with all the passion and love that he could muster, it was for her that he was alive now. For her alone, he had no one left. Every breath that wheezed and shuddered and rattled through his lungs was for her. He told himself that if he kept himself strong, he could keep her strong too.

So he tried his best, taking the medicines and eating what he was fed, but not before she got her medicine, not before she got her food. Yes Edward was trying, desperately trying, to hang onto life because if he could hang on to his life, he could help her hang onto hers. However, Edward was failing. He tried not to acknowledge it at first, but it quickly became glaringly obvious. She wasn't getting any better, and worse than that, her health was deterriorating at a much quicker and more alarming rate than his.

The doctors did not tell him as much, but he saw how they looked at her, and what he did not see in their faces he saw in hers. Her lovely heart shaped face was now thin and drawn. Her skin, always peaches and cream, was pale and grey and when her pale lids were not closed over them, her once brilliant warm brown eyes looked dull and lifeless. He knew she was dying. He was dying as well. It wasn't fair. He was young and in love, lying on his death bed before he was even eighteen years old, looking at the pathetic form of the girl that would've been his wife. It wasn't fair.

She stirred gently in her sleep and her eyes blinked open. He watched the confusion stir in her eyes when she looked at him. Nowadays it took her longer to recognise him, her memories were made indistinct by her high fever and often times she would become confused and not remember where she was.

"Edward," she croaked eventually, her voice so soft and rough he could barely hear her.

"Hush my love," Edward said, his own voice was barely a whisper and unrecognisable to his own ears, "Do not strain your voice."

He held her hand in his, it felt so weak and lifeless in his grasp, so tiny. He summoned some energy to squeeze it gently.

"If...I...do not...speak now," She said her breaths laboured and speech coming with great difficulty, "when...will I...get a...a chance?"

"We will have all the chances in the world," Edward said as soothingly as he could, trying to keep his face from crumpling, "Now rest."

"I will not," She said with more strength than she had done for many weeks, "No more...no...no longer, I am going...going to leave you...my Edward."

"No, no, you're not going anywhere," Edward said as fiercely as he could.

"Yes...I'm going...to leave you," Her voice shook as she forced out her words, "but you mustn't give...give up...you have to keep trying to...to...to get better. Promise...promise me."

Edward shook his head slowly. He trembled from head to toe as he contemplated what she was asking him.

"You must!" She cried in her tiny voice, "You have...have to promise...so I can go."

Tears welled in his eyes and his body rebelled against the very thought. Without her there was no life.

"I can't," Edward said and a sob was wrenched from him, "I can't promise...without you, I can't...I have nothing to live for."

She panted for air as moved her frail body just a fraction of an ich closer to him. Her muscles ached and her bones cried out in protest but she needed to look right into his eyes.

"Don't...don't say that!" She cried gasping as she too began to cry, "you have...you have to...go on without me, let me go in peace Edward, I...I won't be able to...unless you promise me."

Edward knew it was selfish of him to demand her to hang on to life, just so he would not suffer alone and broken hearted. She was suffering now, he could see the pain written all over her face. She was his angel for so long, she deserved peace, she deserved heaven.

"I promise...I'll try," Edward finally managed to choke out, his hand grasped her's as tightly as he dared, "but I don't know if I can...I love you so much...you are my life."

"We'll see each other again," She said gently and a strangely tranquil expression came across her face as she smiled at him, "Now sleep my darling, sleep, and remember this if we ever meet again."

When Edward awoke his love was gone. Tall, still, silent and ever glorious, Dr Cullen stood by the empty bed. His expression as he looked at Edward was one of heart breaking sadness.

"I'm so sorry," he began but his words were halted when Edward turned away from him.

"She's at peace," were his only words.

After that, true to his word, Edward did not give up on trying to get better. His daily mantra was 'I promise'. However, his body grew weaker without her beside him, and each breath he took drained more energy, his will to survive decreased without his primary motivation, and soon, Edward was sure that it was his time to die.

As he breathed what he was sure was his last breath the final word on his lips was, "Isabella."

**Ok, so this is a pretty sad start but things won't always be so gloomy. What do you think of the idea? let me know!**


	2. Welcome to Forks

**Hi! Thanks for your reviews, I'm so glad you like the prologue! I wanted to get this chapter out asap so we can really get the story going!**

**Enjoy! And please review, whether you like the chapter or not, I want to hear why.**

Chapter 1

Welcome to Forks

My mom drove me to the airport, the windows rolled down and the wind streaming through them, making our hair whip against our faces. It was seventy five degrees in Phoenix, the city I had grown up in, and I loved it. The heat could be felt even in the warm air that was gusting into the car as my mother sped up the highway. It was wonderful, warm, and I wore my white sleeve-less eyelet lace shirt as a farewell to it all.

I was going to a place that was far different to Phoenix. Forks was a small town in the Olympic Peninsula of northwest Washington. It rains in Forks more than it does in any other place in America, the weather is always cold and damp. My mother, unbelieveably, was a native to this little town but she had escaped with me when I was only a baby. Every summer, as a child, I'd visited my father in Forks and my impression of the town did not change. I didn't like it, at all.

However, none of that mattered. Forks was where I was headed and I wasn't going to change my mind, no matter what my mother said.

"Are you sure about this?" she asked for about the hundredth time, she looked at me concernedly, "You don't have to you know."

"I know Mom," I replied as I always did, "I want to go."

It was a lie, but one I had to tell. My mom had met someone, Phil Dwyer, and they had gotten married. Phil was everything my mother needed in a man, young, energetic, handsome and, most of all, responsible. I was happy for her, truly I was, but for some reason living with a happily married couple made me feel uncomfortably sad. I didn't know why, and now an opportunity had presented itself for me to get away and take a break from all the happiness and affection.

Phil had to go on tour. He was a baseball player, no one famous, but his team was touring around the country and my mother wanted to go with him. She didn't tell me so of course, but I could tell, without him at home with her, she would be unhappy. So with a determination I could barely feel I said I would spend the year in Forks, with my Dad.

"Tell Charlie I say hi," My Mother said as we stood in the airport.

"I will."

"And remember to email me as soon as you get there!"

"Promise Mom," I laughed lightly, suddenly feeling a bit tearful.

"If you want to come back, just call and-"

"I'll be fine!" I said nonchalantly, "It'll be great, don't worry, have fun on tour with Phil."

"Love you Bella," She said hugging me.

"Love you too Mom," I replied trying desperately not to cry.

A few minutes later I was boarding my plane and still fighting tears. The plane ride from Phoenix to Seattle was four hours, then it was another hour from Seattle to Port Angeles, and an hour drive up to Forks from there. I felt a little uncomfortable about the drive with Charlie, my Dad. I'd often thought that he and I were far too similar. With my mother my timid nature did not matter as she she talked and laughed enough for the both of us. However, with Charlie, there were long silences and an air of awkwardness that never seemed to go away.

Charlie was happy though, that I was coming to live with him. I often felt guilty when I thought of him living all alone in the same house he'd lived in with my mother when they got married. I knew he missed me, even though he never made a big deal of it, and I knew that part of me was glad to be going to stay with him because of that.

When I arrived in Port Angeles I immediately saw Charlie waiting at arrivals. He gave me a shy smile and an awkward hug and kiss on my hair when I drew close.

"It's good to see you Bells," he said smiling as he took my luggage and began lugging it away towards his police cruiser, "How's Renee?"

"Good, she's fine," I said a little uncomfortably, I'd always gotten the feeling that Charlie never had gotten over my Mother, "It's good to see you too Dad."

When we passed the 'Welcome to Forks' sign, it suddenly began to rain. How ironic was that. As we drove along the wet roads, zipping past dark green forests and mossy rocks, Charlie unexpectedly broke the long silence.

"So, I found you a car," he said out of no where.

"Oh, uh, thanks," I said a bit startled, "What kind of car?"

"Well, it's a truck actually," Charlie said shifting in his seat slightly, "An old Chevy, but it runs well, and it's a sturdy old thing."

_THING..._ Well it certainly sounded interesting...

"Well how much is it?" I asked thinking about the amount of money I'd brought with me, "I've got some money saved up-"

Charlie chuckled cutting me off.

"I've already bought it for you Bells" he said, giving me his crinkly eyed smile, "It's my welcome home present to you."

I stared at him for a moment. _Welcome home..._he'd said. Well Forks was my new home now, at least for the moment and my Dad had bought me a...thing.

"Thanks Dad," I said genuinely grateful, "You really didn't have to."

"Nonsense, I don't get to get you stuff at all," he said jokingly but I detected a note of sadness in his voice, "Give your Dad a chance eh? I want you to be happy here."

He didn't look at me as he said all this, like me, he was shy with his emotions.

"Thanks Dad," I said again telling myself that no matter what, I was going to love the _thing_.

When we pulled into Charlie's driveway I was not disappointed. My new truck was a faded red colour, with big round fenders and a bulbous cap. Immediately I loved it. How bizaare.

"Dad it's great!" I said springing out of the cruiser to inspect my new truck.

"So you like it then?" Charlie asked, a smile in his voice.

"I love it!"

The first night was the hardest. I cried myself to sleep that night, missing my home back in Phoenix and dreading school the next day. What would the kids here think of me? They probably all knew who I was, Charlie was the Chief of Police, they might know I lived in Phoenix. I would be the new girl from the city. An oddity.

Not that in Phoenix I was accepted at school. For the most part I was ignored. In a world of bleach blonds and tanned skin, I was the pale brunette. I'd never found a niche there. I wasn't athletic, or outspoken, or funny, or interesting in general. I was just me. A quiet bookish girl who didn't go to parties or wear fashionable clothes, too shy to make friends.

I didn't know how to relate to people my age. I was never childish, even when I actually was a child. I felt sometimes that I raised my mother more than she raised me and always accompanying me was a sense of yearning. For what, I did not know, but it followed me throughout my life, growing stronger every year. You know the feeling you get when you're missing something really important but for some reason you can't find it? It was like that. Almost painful. It had gotten worse when my Mom got together with Phil.

In the morning I had a quiet breakfast with Charlie, eggs on toast, before he left to go to the station. Then I was alone. I didn't want to get to school too early, that would mean more waiting around uncomfortably without the distraction of classes. When I could no longer stay in the quiet house any longer, I put on my jacket and ducked out into the rain.

It was just drizzling really as I jogged, carefully, to my truck and clambered in. It was nice and dry inside and smelt faintly of tobacco. When I started the truck the roar of the engine startled me so much that I jumped in my seat. I laughed to myself as I backed out of the driveway. That would definitly take some getting used to.

Finding the school wasn't difficult. It was just off the highway, but I almost missed it because of it's appearance. It certainly didn't look like a school. It looked like a small collection of red brick houses, all grouped together and surrounded by trees. It was pretty.

I parked in front of the closest building and hopped out of the truck. In front of the building was a sign saying 'Front Office'. There were no other cars parked there but I thought I would get directions inside instead of driving around aimlessly. I took a deep breath before pushing open the door.

Inside was warm and brightly lit. It was a small office a bit cluttered, but decorated with plants and awards that gleamed on the walls. Behind a busy desk sat a plump red haired woman wearing a purple t-shirt.

"Can I help you dear?" she asked in a sweet voice which made me feel more comfortable.

"Um, yes," I said awkwardly, "I'm Isabella Swan, I'm new...I just-"

"Oh, of course," she cut me off, quickly rifling through a pile of papers stacked next to her on the floor, "I have your schedule and a map of the school, right here, ah."

She pulled out a few sheets of paper.

"Have all of your teachers today sign that one," she instructed, "you have to bring it back at the end of the day, hope you'll like it here in Forks."

When I left the office other students were beginning to arrive. I was glad to see that my truck was not going to be the oldest car in the parking lot. I drove it around the school, following the other cars to the designated student parking spaces. The newest looking car there was a shiny silver Volvo and it definitely stood out. Before I left the truck I stuffed the map in my bag along with my timetable. I knew I'd be looking at them all day.

Taking a deep shuddering breath I exited the truck with my bag slung over my shoulder. I pulled my hood over my hair to sheild it from the rain aswell as to avoid anyone seeing the petrified expression on my face. Memories of all my first days at school were rushing back to haunt me. I was extremely nervous.

Once I got around the cafeteria I sighted building three. The place where my first class was to take place. I followed two girls down a stone pathway which led to the door. The class room was small and bright. The girls infront of me stopped to hang their coats by the door and I copied them, noting the fact that their complexions were both almost if not just as pale as mine.

I took my name slip to the teacher for him to sign it. His name was Mr Mason and he stared at me when he saw my name, prompting me to blush. However I was pleased with the fact that he sent me to my desk at the back of the class without making me introduce myself. At the back of the class it was easier to pretend I was blending into the wall. Well, I wanted to at least, everyone was looking back at me like I was a science experiment. I spent the majority of the class painted a tomato red and staring down at the reading list Mr Mason had given me. It was a fairly basic one, Bronte, Shakespeare, Chaucer and Faulkner. I'd read all of the books before. It was a relief, if not boring, at least I knew I could get through this class easily.

My next class was Government and I was led there by an eager dark haired boy with acne. His name was Eric Yorkie and he was the first student to talk to me for the day. And talk he did. I just kept nodding my head, unable to keep up with his fast paced monologue.

The rest of the morning passed similarly. The only class I knew I would dislike was Trigonometry, the teacher seemed evil and I'd always hated the subject anyway. I was also beginning to recognise people who sat near me in classes. More people joined Eric and introduced themselves to me and I tried my best to remember their names but it was difficult.

Jessica Stanley, a girl who sat with me in Trig and Spanish, walked with me to the Cafeteria at lunch. She was quite short but her wildly curly hair made up for her lack of height. She introduced me to her group of friends and I promptly forgot their names by the time she was finished. It was while I was sitting there, shyly picking at my lunch, that I spied them across the room.

They were sitting as far away from everyone else as possible. There were five of them. They weren't talking to eachother or eating, even though each of them had a tray of food in front of them. Unlike most of the other students, they weren't staring at me, so I looked at them without fear of being caught.

They didn't look anything alike. There were three boys, One big and muscular with curly dark hair, another leaner, taller with long blond hair, the other was smaller, more boyish than the others. His hair was an unusual coppery reddish brown. The sight of it sparked a strange feeling in me. I couldn't see his face, he was facing away from me, but I desperately wanted to.

The two girls were like chalk and cheese. One was tall, blond, and curvy, she looked like a model for 'Victoria's Secret' and my self esteem went down about a hundred points just looking at her. The other girl was tiny, thin and quirky. She had a fine pixie face and her jet black hair was short and she wore it spiked out in all directions.

As I looked over at them she caught my eye and a smile came across her lips. When I smiled back awkwardly, she winked and looked away. I had no time to be confused by her behaviour before the boy with reddish brown hair turned in his seat and looked at me. I gasped just as his eyes widened and an expression of amazement and confusion came across his face. Just as quickly as he'd looked at me, he looked away again. Leaving me breathless and wondering at the thought that had crossed my mind when I looked into his eyes. '_My Edward...'_

I looked away from the beautiful people I'd been ogling, still reeling. I turned to my Jessica who was completely unaware of the momentous thing that had just occured. My body was still tingling from it.

"Who are they?" I whispered to Jessica, glancing once again, over to them. They were talking now, all of them had expressions of confusion on their faces. All except the pixie girl, she was smiling sweetly, swinging her legs under the table.

Jessica followed my gaze to the table they all sat at. Suddenly the boy with the reddish brown hair, the one I, weirdly, was sure was called Edward, looked up at me. He stared at me questioningly for a long moment. His expression was one of infinite wonder. As his eyes lingered on me I blushed and a hint of a smile touched his lips before he looked away. Breaking the trance he had held me in.

Jessica giggled.

"What was that?" she breathed looking down at the table, "He's never looked over here before, not like that."

I had been sure he'd been looking at me, not just in this direction but I just shrugged.

"That's Edward Cullen," she said, her cheeks pink, "The big one is Emmett Cullen and the girl that's leaving now is Alice Cullen."

Alice Cullen, the pixie like girl, was indeed gracefully leaving the table. However my mind was once again reeling. His name was Edward. I was stunned.

"The blond guy is Jasper Hale," Jessica continued, "And the other girl is his twin sister Rosalie, they all live together with Dr. Cullen and his wife."

She said all of this in a barely audible whisper. I glanced conspicuously at the beautiful Edward, picking a his bagel but not bringing any of the pieces to his mouth, once again 'my Edward' popped into my thoughts and I blushed pushing it away. I hadn't even met him. As soon as that thought came into my head, another countered it. _Yes you have..._

_His face was so familiar..._

Had I met him before? Surely I would've remembered a face so lovely. Almost as though he'd read my thoughts he looked my way again. He looked frustrated and disbelieving, he was shaking his head ever so slightly. A determined look came to his face, like he'd made up his mind about something. He shook his head again and turned to face the others at his table.

_Where had I seen that face before?_

"They are all very...good looking," I said, an epic understatement.

"Oh definitely!" Jessica laughed, "But they're all together, Rosalie's with Emmett and Jasper's with Alice, they live together! It's so weird...Only Edward's single."

_Good._

Jessica must've seen the slight smile that came to my lips because she spoke quickly.

"But don't get your hopes up," she said in a slightly sour tone, "He doesn't date, apparently no one here is good enough for him."

I bit my lip, hiding a smile, it was obvious she'd been turned down at some point. I glanced at Edward again, unable to keep my eyes away, and saw that his cheek was lifted in what might be a smile.

"The Cullens don't look related," I said to Jessica.

"Oh, no," she said eager to dish out all she knew, "they're adopted, all of them, well actually, the Hales are foster kids. Dr. Cullen and his wife are really young, like in their twenties. Rosalie and Jasper are actually related though."

"That's really nice of them," I said of the Doctor and his wife, "to take care of so many kids, when they're so young themselves."

"Hmm...I suppose," Jessica seemed unwilling to pay a compliment, "I think that Mrs. Cullen can't have kids though."

_As if that diminished her kindness in any way._

Edward had not looked over again but the other members of his family did, they all seemed to be curious about me for some reason. Of course, I was the new girl from Phoenix. They weren't the only ones staring at me.

"Have they always lived in Forks?"

"Oh no!" Jessica said it like it should be obvious, "They moved here from Alaska two years ago."

I felt a surge of pity for them. As beautiful as they all were, they were clearly not accepted here, even after two years. I wondered why.

After a few more minutes they all stood and left their table. They were all noticeably graceful, even the huge didn't look at me again. It made me feel slightly upset.

When the bell rang, signalling the end of lunch, I walked to my next class, Biology, with one of Jessica's friends, a shy girl called Angela. We walked together in a comfortable silence. As soon as we entered the class I felt his eyes on me. His expression was slightly pained, but also hopeful and sad. I felt a pang in my heart. Oddly I wanted to cry.

As I walked over to the teacher's desk to get my slip signed our eyes connected briefly and I stopped dead in my tracks. A feeling of complete deja vu hit me and I stumbled slightly, bringing my hand up to my head. Edward Cullen...something about his name was wrong.

_Cullen...his name isn't Cullen..._

I couldn't understand what was happening to me. One glimpse and he was all I could think about. I had never given any boy a second thought, ever. The only empty seat in the whole class room was next to him. I made my way there, keeping my eyes cast down, avoiding his gaze. My raging thoughts were giving me a headache. I didn't understand why I felt like I knew him.

I sat down in the seat next to him, arranging my work books neatly in front of me. The first thing I noticed him do was take a deep breath. A long deep breath. Then another and another. He made a soft noise, almost a moan. I felt my face heat up. Was he...smelling me? I hadn't worn any perfume, I never did, I inconspiculously sniffed my hair and detected a whiff of my usual strawberry shampoo. Surely he couldn't smell that, it wasn't strong.

I hazarded a glance at him. On his face was a look of such intense longing that I gasped. He looked so desperate. Suddenly I realised something. The feeling I always had, the one of yearning, of sadness, like I was missing something essential, it was completely gone. It had been ever since I'd first seen him. Was he it? The thing I was missing?

How could that be? We'd never met. Then why did it feel like we had, why did I feel so drawn to him, like if he was suddenly the sun in my universe. How had I known his name? Why had I called him...

"My Edward," too late I realised I had spoken out loud. I had been barely a whisper but he'd heard me I could tell. He shook his head looking away, his body was tense, his fists clenched. His mouth seemed to be quickly mouthing the word 'no'.

I sighed in frustration. I had been sneaking glances at him all class. I knew his face, all of it. I knew his strong muscular jaw, his full masculine lips, his riotous bronze hair and his perfect straight nose. Certain things seemed wrong though.

_His skin was never so pale...His eyes...wrong colour..._

I couldn't say how I knew these things though and it was killing me. The class seemed to go so quickly, I hardly heard a word of 's lecture. Every second was spent on thoughts of the boy next to me. As soon as the bell rang he was out of his seat and through the door. He paused for a moment there and glanced back at me before once again shaking his head. Then he was gone.

I stared after him feeling lonely and cold, tears once again pricked in my eyes. I had been so emotional that day, up and down constantly, all because of him.

"Hi, Isabella Swan right?" A voice came suddenly distracting me. I looked around and saw a smiling, baby faced boy, his blonde hair was perfectly spiked up. He was grinning at me in a friendly way.

"Bella," I corrected forcing myself to smile in return.

"Mike, nice to meet you," He said playfully shaking my hand, "Need any help finding your next class?"

"Um, I think it's Gym so I'm pretty sure I can find it."

"That's my next class too!" He said happily, "I'll walk you there."

Mike was really nice but very talkative, he led our conversation all the way to the gym.

"So, do you know Edward Cullen from somewhere?" Mike asked casually as we entered the gym.

_I don't know._

"Uh no..." I trailed off awkwardly, "why?"

"I don't know," Mike shrugged, "he was looking at you like..."

"Like what?"

Mike just shrugged again.

"It was just weird," he said finally, "he never usually pays anyone any attention."

The coach didn't make me play today and I was glad. I had a long history of injuries, both inflicted and sustained, while doing P.E.

When the final bell rang I went to the office to hand in my slip before heading back to my truck. As I was nearing the parking lot I noticed that Edward and Alice Cullen were standing away from everyone else, half hidden by two large trees and a group of bushes. They were obviously arguing and Edward looked very upset. Once again my heart gave a strange pang. A gust of cool wind distracted me by whipping my hair around me face, when it was finally out of my eyes I saw Edward take a huge breath and he turned from Alice and caught my gaze. His eyes searched mine for an instant before he abrubtly stormed away.

Alice Cullen smiled at me just as she had done at lunch, before she followed her brother across the parking lot. When I got home that afternoon I sat at the kitchen table and stared into space, I felt waves of my intense yearning returning to me. Why was Edward so familiar?

**Ok so first chapter...Do you like it?**

**Some of the dialouge is taken from 'Twilight' in this chapter, it of course belongs to SM!**


	3. Impossible

**Sorry for making you wait for this chapter, I'm crap with time management! I saw this oppoetunity to post this chapter and I grabbed it and ran. This chapter is written in Edward's point of veiw but it is rare in that way, it might actually be the only one written in his point of veiw. I just thought it was necessary to show his reaction to the situation in the first chapter. I hope you enjoy it!**

Chapter 2

Impossible

The day had been monotonous. Every day was. I didn't know how much longer I could keep up with this charade. Pretending to be a high school student, year after year, school after school, it was a tedious ploy. I did it because the others said it would give me something to do with my time, something other than brooding, and mourning. I had hoped, as well, that it would serve to take my mind away from the pain and loss I'd felt for almost a century. It didn't.

My mind was always, and would always, be occupied by thoughts of her. My love, my life, my Bella. She was everthing to me, even though she was gone, I strived to remember everything about her that I could. Her smile, her laugh, her sparkling brown eyes, the way she spoke in that soft gentle voice...

How I missed her.

Over the years my family had attempted to help me move on. They had introduced me to women of my kind, hoping I would feel the slightest amount of attraction for them, but I couldn't. I would never love anyone the way I loved her. When I closed my eyes all I saw was her face, memories of her swimming before me like illusive ghosts, mere figments of my mind.

Carlisle speculated, in his mind for he had not wanted to speak it aloud, that she had been my mate, though I found her as a human. The level of which I loved her and the fact that I was still mourning her loss, almost a century later prompted his theory. Vampires, once they find their mates, love them forever, irrevocably. The loss of one's mate usually drove them to madness, or suicide. I had contemplated it once, wondering how it would feel to sink into nothingness and be numb. It had been back when my pain was fresh and my heart newly broken, I had wanted nothing more than to follow her to where ever she had gone.

But I had promised her I would go on without her and though I had made that promise when I was sure my time on earth was coming to a close I still honoured it. It was her last request, and my final vow to her. It would not be broken.

So here I was eighty-seven years later at Forks High School, going through the motions of being a seventeen year old high school student, again. My siblings liked it in Forks, for the most part it was an easy place for us to live, we could attend the high school on most days and Carlisle could work in the hospital, due to the almost constant rainfall. Of course we were still subjects of speculation, we would always stand out no matter what we did, but being a small town the people of Forks speculated in secret. It did help that being what we were injected a healthy dose of intimidation into the air around us. That certainly kept the more inquisitive types at bay.

At Forks High, we were given a wide berth by the rest of the students. I wasn't complaining. We sat, as we did everyday, at the table fathest from everyone else. We sat there silently almost everyday with trays of food, which would only go to waste, infront of us and pretended to eat. Today Alice had been behaving strangely. She was my favourite of my new sisters and I was closer to her than any of the others, except perhaps Carlisle and Esme. Perhaps it was because her usually bouyant mood balanced off my general melancholy. Today she was hiding something from me though.

She'd had a vision the night before. It had flashed through her mind so quickly that I'd been unable to really figure out what it was she had seen. Whatever it was filled her with such an intense happiness and excitement that both Jasper and I had instantly become incredibly interested. She told neither of us what she'd seen, 'just wait', she'd said cryptically and her eyes had sparkled with joy as she looked at me all night and into this morning.

The cafeteria was fair buzzing with noise, both aural and mental. Everyone seemed to be excited by the arrival of Cheif Swan's daughter from Phoenix, their minds were preoccupied with speculating about the poor girl and I tried my best to tune them out as I pulled apart a bagel with my fingers. Around the table my family were occupying themselves by whispering sweet nothings to their significant others. Sometimes, infact most of the time, it was very difficult to be around them all. It made me ache for Bella even more. I tried to tune them out too. Everything was reduced to a faint hum in the back of my mind.

_'Ah...there she is!'_ Alice's jubilant thought cut loudly through my barrier, I looked up to see her wink at someone behind me. I quickly turned, curious to know who had caught her attention. I stared, my mind reeling, my dead heart leaping in my chest. Was it her? It couldn't be...

_My Bella?_

I turned back rapidly in my seat, my chest heaving. Around me I heard the curious thoughts of my family but I couldn't even look at them. She was so beautiful, sitting there across the room, her long mahogany hair cascading down around her face and her eyes...I closed my own savouring the feeling I'd had when our eyes had met. She was just as I remembered her.

"Who are they?"

Without realising I had tuned in, trying to hear her thoughts, instead I simply her voice. Sweet and soft and timid, just as I remembered. However, her thoughts were not there, I couldn't hear anything from her. I was stumped.

_'Figures she would notice the Cullens...'_

Jessica Stanley's mental voice registered in my mind just as loudly as it always did. She was sitting next to...the girl, she couldn't be...It was to Jessica that her question was directed.

"Edward, man, what's wrong?" It was Emmett.

Finally I looked up to see them all staring at me with wide eyes and concern. I wondered what I must've looked like to them. Alice was smiling at me sweetly.

"You knew about this?" I stated, "You knew an you didn't tell me...why? How?"

"Calm down Edward," Alice said lightly, "You had to find out this way, trust me, why are you worrying aren't you happy?"

"Happy?" Rosalie asked, her curiousity evident in her voice, "what are you talking about?"

"Edward's Bella is here," Alice said and they all gaped at me. I shook my head.

"Isabella Swan?" Rosalie asked incredulously, "The police cheif's daughter, I mean I heard the name but..."

"Look," Alice said steadily, "We'll talk later, now's not the time, don't resist this Edward, trust me."

She got up and moved away, quickly making her way out of the cafeteria. The others looked at me seemingly waiting for some kind of explanation I could not give.

I turned in my seat once again to look at her. She was looking at me too. Once again our eyes met and I searched hers with mine. She looked just like my Bella, just like her. It was almost painful to look. There was something in her expression that I couldn't understand but as I continued to watch her she blushed deeply, lowering her eyes a little but maintaining our contact. I felt my lips lift in appreciation of her loveliness before I turned back to my confused siblings.

"Edward, what was Alice talking about?" Rosalie asked.

Next to her Emmett nodded and Jasper was staring from me to the mysterious girl with increasing amazing growing in his eyes.

"I don't know," I said dazedly, "She looks...but how can it be, my Bella is...she's gone."

They all stared at me worriedly.

"I dunno Edward," Emmett said hesitantly, "She sure looks like your Bella, I've seen the picture."

"It can't be..." I muttered, only half paying attention to their racing thoughts. My talent was focused on...Isabella. Jessica was telling her what she knew about us. I watched her expressions in Jessica's mind, marvelling at how like she was to my Bella. It had to be a coincidence, she couldn't be her, I couldn't allow my self to hope.

"She recognises you," Jasper said suddenly, "She feels like she knows you, but she's confused too..."

Jasper was trying to get a read on her emotions but it seemed to be proving difficult for him. He looked at me.

"Can you tell what she's thinking?" he asked me.

I turned to look at her again, straining my mind to see into hers, but nothing. I got nothing at all. She was silent to me, completely silent, I had never encoutered this problem before. I watched her for a while longer. She looked so confused, her wide browns eyes wandered my face, searching. Could Alice be right? Could this girl really be Isabella, _my Isabella_? A small inkling of hope began to grow inside me but I smothered it quickly. No, it was impossible. Completely ridiculous to even contemplate, I would just be setting myself up for even more hurt if I allowed this nonsense to continue. She wasn't my Bella.

Turning around I faced my family and shook my head.

"No," I told Jasper, "her mind is silent to me, I can't hear her at all."

Their thoughts all erupted in surprise at that.

"How is that possible?" Emmett asked in wonder, "Damn, how is any of it possible? Is she really...you know?"

"No," I said, "Alice is wrong, it's impossible, completely ridiculous, I..."

I trailed off resting my head in my hands, I was in turmoil. I needed to talk to Carlisle, my Father. He could calm my concerns, reassure my that Alice was wrong. The only problem was that I didn't want her to be. I wanted her to be right.

"It must all just be a coincidence," Rosalie said after a long silence, "this girl is human, if she _was_ your Isabella...well, I mean, it's been almost a century... you're right Edward, it's impossible."

"Impossible," I whispered, tormented.

_'Ha, she's eyeing Edward Cullen already.'_

Jessica's thoughts cut into my mind along with an image of Bella, seemingly entranced as she looked at me.

_'Bella Swan, you've got no more of a chance than the rest of us, trust me I've tried..."_

Her thoughts were sour and immaturely whiny, a small smile curved my lips as I thought of her early advances and how I'd turned her down, politely, each time.

"The Cullens don't look related," Isabella said after a few minutes.

_'They're not...'_ Jessica thought before launching into our cover story, she knew it by heart.

"That's really nice of them," Isabella said, a hint of admiration in her voice, "To take care of so many kids, when they're so young themselves."

It wasn't often that people saw things that way. Granted our story was a complete lie and Carlisle and Esme didn't really _'take care' _of us in the sense that she meant, if it was all actually true then you would expect people to think highly of them. That was not usually the case. People enjoyed a good scandal, it was much more interesting.

"Hmm, I suppose," Jessica said reluctantly, "I think that can't have kids though."

I saw that Rosalie, Emmett and Jasper were all looking over at Isabella Swan and I glared at them.

"Stop that," I hissed lowly, "don't ogle at her, you're drawing attention to yourselves."

"Oh please Edward," Rosalie scoffed rolling her eyes, "It's not as though no one else in the room is doing the same, she's new, remember."

I rolled my eyes at my sister.

"Come on," Jasper said looking at his watch, "the bell's about to ring."

I sighed, getting out of my seat. It's what a needed, some time away from this girl to sit and sift through my thoughts. I had Biology next, , the teacher, never called on me. It was the perfect time to think about all this.

I made my way to class without glancing back at the girl. I didn't like to think of her as 'Isabella', it made me think of the other Isabella, _my_ Isabella, and I didn't want to think of her like that. I took my usual seat at the back of the class and looked out the window. Slowly students began to filter in, chattering loudly about all manner of inconsequential things. I thought of Alice. She'd seemed hurt earlier when I said I didn't believe her. I usually trusted her visions and intuitions but not now, not about this. It was simply too outrageous to be true.

No matter how much I wanted it to be. I couldn't let myself believe it. The girl, she looked so much like my Bella, sounded so much like her, it was almost as though it _was_ her. Just being in the same room had eased some of the pain I had carried in my heart all these years, I hadn't realised before, but now that I was away from her it all returned to me with renewed vengeance. I closed my eyes and breathed out deeply, visions of my sweet love swam before my eyes, tugging at my heart.

When I opened my eyes there she was, standing at the front of the class room. Our eyes met once more. Was it really wrong of me to hope, would it scar me too much for me to bear if Alice is wrong?

Yes, it would, but I couldn't help myself. I truly felt like I was looking at my Love, my eyes recognised her and so did my heart, only my mind battled my instincts. As I watched her, her eyes glistened with unshed tears and I longed to comfort her and to ask what was the matter.

She started to walk up to Mr. Banner's desk when all of a sudden she stopped dead in her tracks, stumbling slightly, I clutched the edge of the table prepared to catch her if she should fall, my Bella was always clumsy. However she didn't, merely raised a hand to her forehead as if to soothe a bad headache, when our eyes met again something akin to suspicion sparked in hers.

She handed a piece of paper to the teacher and he signed it quickly and pointed out the only empty seat in the room, the one next to me. So much for wanting some time to think.

She made her way over to my table with her eyes cast down. She was avoiding my gaze, I knew, and I didn't like it. If I couldn't read her mind then I would've liked, atleast, to be able to read her eyes.  
She sat next to me and arranged her things before her on the table. I took another deep breath and was stunned. I hadn't realised it, but I'd been unconsciously holding my breath up until that point, now I caught her scent. It was the most beautiful, sensuous and sweet scent I had ever come across, it made me feel hot and cold at the same time. Oddly, it was not delicious in the food sort of way but more like the most attractive perfume I had ever smelt. I took another deep breath and then another, trying to keep the sweet air in my lungs. I felt a soft moan burble up from within me and couldn't find it in myself to be ashamed, even though I knew she must've heard it. I was entranced by her scent.

I looked over to see her looking at me. Her eyes were wide and her mouth open slightly, slowly she drew her bottom lip into her mouth and her teeth pressed into it slightly. It was a habit I rembered my Bella having and it almost drew another moan from me. I realised with a start that this girl was spurring reactions in me that I hadn't had since I was human, I was deeply attracted to her and suddenly found it difficult to keep my hands to my self.

She was so beautiful, staring at me with her big brown eyes, her long hair framing her heart shaped face. I had never really seen my Bella's hair down, not like this, it was always pinned up or under a hat, as was what was proper back then. When she got ill, they had cut her lovely hair off till it barely brushed her chin. This girl's hair was just like Bella's, long and flowing and deep brown, I wanted to run my fingers through it, to see if it was as soft as it looked, bury my face in it and luxuriate in her scent...

"My Edward," she whispered softly, so softly I knew she hadn't meant for me to hear. I remembered myself and turned away from her reeling for what felt like the hundreth time that day. She'd said it in that voice, Bella's voice, it brought back so many memories. It was like she was there, sitting right next to me...

No! It wasn't her. It wasn't. I just missed Bella so much that I was almost convincing myself that this girl was truly her, because she looked so like her, it was easy to believe, but I wouldn't do that to myself, I couldn't. This Isabella Swan was a young human girl with her whole life ahead of her, it would be cruel of me to use her as a replacement for my lost love, not to mention the damage I would do to myself. It mattered not that I was attracted to her, she looked like Bella, it could only be expected, but she wasn't Bella and I could never love another.

I felt her eyes on me for the remainder of the lesson, I didn't look at her again till I was about to leave the room. She stared at me, and I could only describe the expression on her face as hurt. I shook my head to clear of thoughts of going to her and fair sprinted out of the room, out of the school and over to my car. I got in, leaning my head against the head rest and pulling at my hair. I was so confused.

I must've stayed in there for the last two periods of school because before I knew it people were streaming out of the doors and then Alice was there tapping on the glass of the driver's seat window. I got out of the car and looked down at my sister, she was staring at me steadily.

"Come on," she said eventually, beckoning me over to where a cluster of trees would shade us from the veiw of the students in the parking lot.

"You're being ridiculous," Alice stated immediately, "Why can't you see a good thing and accept it for what it is? She's your Bella and you know it!"

"She can't be Alice!" I said frustratedly, "Do you understand how ridiculous it is to even...look, she looks like her, so much, but I can't afford to hope...if you're wrong...it'll kill me."

"I'm not wrong," Alice said stubbornly, "Don't you want to be happy Edward, ever since I've known ou, you've been mourning the loss of Isabella, you have a chance to be with her again."

"She died Alice!" I hissed, feeling my heart give way to pain and sorrow, "She's not coming back, no matter how much I miss her, how much I want her, she's gone. I've learnt to accept that. I won't fill my heart with false hope, I don't know what you've seen but it doesn't matter, people don't come back from the dead! She's gone Alice, she's gone!"

"Stranger things than this have happened Edward," Alice said sternly, "We are both testaments to the fact that things aren't all black and white, shades of grey exist in between!"

"She's not one of us Alice," I growled, "She's human!"

"I never said she was our particular shade," Alice said calmly, "you know I'm right Edward, just look at what I've seen, I'll show you..."

"No," I sighed, "It doesn't matter."

"What do you mean it doesn't matter?"

"I mean..." I trailed off anxiously, "Alice even if she is...how can I be with her, may be she's better off without me..."

"Oh Edward!" Alice cried distressed, "No, no, no, don't you see? She's your mate, your soul mate! She'll be lost without you, just as you are without her! I'll show you, just let me show you Edward!"

"No Alice," I said firmly, "She's human, she doesn't belong in our world, if she is...if she's Bella...I want her to live a full life, the life we might've had, there were things we wanted Alice...Things I can't give her now, if she is my Bella I want her to be happy."

"Edward no!" Alice said urgently, "you're going to ruin everything!"

"Alice just-" I halted my words, a gust of cool air brought a rush of sweet floral scented air at me, I couldn't help but breathe it in, it calmed me to an extent. I looked over at the origen of the lustrous scent, she was so...beautiful...

I shook my head. No!

I couldn't think that way. I walked away from Alice, from Isabella, and over to the car. The others were already there, waiting. I ignored their mental questions as Alice hopped into the backseat and pulled out of the parking space heading home. I had made up my mind. I would not allow myself to get close to Isabella Swan, it would not do either of us any good.

**Ok, so many of you are probably thinking, 'why is Edward being such a prat?'**

**Well the truth is he thinks he's doing the right thing but he's also scared. Scared that if he gets his hopes up they'll be dashed and his heart will be completely shattered. Give him some time to work things out, he's a little bamboozled at the 't you be? Yes...I said bamboozled.**

**Next chapter will be BPOV, how will she deal with Edward ignoring her?**

**Stick with me and you'll find out! Reviews make my heart sing!**

**Till the next...**


	4. She Was Dead

**Hi! Thanks for your reviews, you guys are awsome!**

**This chapter is actually going to be another surprise point of veiw. Carlisle's. I know right? **

**I am chock full of surprises, me. I even surprise myself, sometimes pleasantly...other times not. **

**Anyway, this chapter came completely out of the blue. I was going to actually do it as an out take when i first thought about it but decided it should be part of the story. **

**Hopefully you all are all pleasantly surprised by what you find in the chapter below. I certainly hope you like it!**

**So I'll let you get on with it, shall I?**

Chapter 3

She Was Dead

I sat in the arm chair, watching my son from across the room. The expression on his face devastated me, he looked so lost, so desperate, so young. He wouldn't make eye contact with anyone in the room. I could see Esme fighting to restrain herself from going to him, to offer him comfort, but nothing could comfort him now. Alice was staring up at me, waiting for me to say something. I didn't know what to say. What could I say to make this any easier?

Eventually, I knew I could hold my silence no longer and let out a soft sigh. I clasped my hands tightly on my lap and looked hard at Edward until he met my gaze.

"You say she is human, this girl?" I asked carefully, soothingly.

"Yes," he whispered casting his gaze to the floor once again.

"Then I don't see how she can be Bella," I said and felt Alice tense nearby, "I examined her myself, she was...She was gone Edward."

Edward nodded, he had know this of course.

For many years after I had changed Edward it could have been said that a large part of him hated me. I had known this and it had hurt me, but I couldn't blame him. He resented me because I had halted his death at a time when he would have readily died. He resented me because I had saved him but I had not saved her. I had not known the depth of his love for her. I did what I did for his mother, who begged me with her last breath to save him. The look in her eyes as she made her final wish haunted me to this day. Her eyes so like his had been had seen right through me, right down to my very soul. I knew she knew what I was, what I could do, she trusted me and she wanted me to save her son.

As he lay dying in his bed I made my decision. I stole him away from the hospital and took him far away from the city, to an old abandoned house where he lay screaming and shouting for three days. When he awoke, he asked me why he was in hell, what he had done to deserve such a fate. He knew Bella was in heaven, he wanted to be with her. As I explained to him what I had done, what his life would be forever more, his crimson eyes grew narrow with rage and quickly wild with sorrow.

Since that time Edward continued to travel with me, determined that if he was to be a monster, he would at least try to make an effort to be good, but always I felt his anger, and always I felt my regret. I knew what I had done. I had condemned a pure soul to an eternity of wandering the earth without his one true love. His mate. Somehow he had met her as a human, it was rarer but I knew it happened. During those day he was liable at times to go into unconsolable bouts of depression, at times like this he could barely look at me, when he wasn't hunting he would simply curl into a ball and let his misery consume him.

I would feel so sick, so sorry. One day he asked me if there was anything we could do to die. I wanted to lie, to tell him no but as I looked into his eyes, so dead and defeated, I found I could not deceive him. I told him how it could be done, how he could be torn apart and set alight, but I told him I would not do it, I could not do it. He had shaken his head and looked out onto the horizon.

"She made me promise," He had muttered, choking back a sob, "I have to keep it, I have to keep on, for her."

It was the same for everything he did, it was all in honour of her that he began to play the piano again though he would never play certain tunes, they made him break down. It was the same when Esme joined our family, I knew it hurt him, knowing that we were together and in love. That he could hardly bear to be in the same room as us for any length of time. He tried, for a while, for her, to stay with us. Eventually though his strength wavered and he left to be on his own for a while.

When he returned to us a year later, his eyes were crimson. He had fallen to temptation and the urges of our kind. He had found that he was even more miserable away from us that he was before. He had reasoned to himself that it was only natural to want the blood of humans, to taste the thing which our bodies craved, and he succumbed to these thoughts. He hunted only the dregs of society, murderers, rapists, sociopaths and abusers. He had lived so for a while, justifying himself with the thought that he was ridding the world of them. But one night he cornered and killed a murderer in an alley way of New York City. As he rose from the corpse of the man he caught sight of his would be victim. She had looked no older that sixteen, she had stared at with wide terrified eyes, brown eyes.

That was why he came back. He had become the thing which he vowed never to be, a monster. He was certain that the young girl had been a sign from God or from Bella who was in heaven. A sign which gave him the strength to return to us. We welcomed him back with open arms, he had changed so much in that year. Now he made an almost conscious effort to be happier to see the light in life and to face love without flinching. He did for her. For Bella, because she wanted him to be happy, he knew.

When I saved Rosalie from certain death in nineteen thirty-five, I had hoped that perhaps Edward would be able to feel some affection for her. It was not to be. He soon confided in me that her thoughts were vain, selfish and ugly. She constantly thought of herself and her great beauty. He was put off by her vanity and ego and she was put off by his obvious disinterest. Eventually though, the two realised that they could be friends if they were willing to put aside their many differences.

In nineteen forty-two Rosalie rushed into our home with the half mangled body of a dark haired man in her arms. She begged me to save him and in her eyes I saw a spark of genuine love and affection glowing as she looked at him. Thus Emmett joined our family and his presence brought out a different side of Edward. A younger brighter side. I finally was able to see him enjoy his life a little more as he and Emmett engaged in boyish games and dares. However, late at night I would hear him play that soft tinkling lullaby on the piano that had made him cry in the past. He could play it through now, without collapsing under the weight of his sadness but everynow and then I would hear a note falter slightly, almost unnoticeable, but I noticed.

One day in nineteen forty-eight, while Edward was out hunting, two strangers arrived on our doorstep with two suit cases and a car full of bags more. Jasper and Alice became a part of our family that day, almost instantaneously as Alice knew us all by name and began rattling off a list of all the things we would do together in the future. When Edward came home that night Emmett and Jasper had moved all his things to the garage, Alice had clearly stated that his room was supposed to be her's, Jasper said gravely that it was unwise to deny her visions and Emmett was only too happy to help them clear Edward's things out.

Edward had reacted, of course, with anger but then out of the house came little Alice, who hopped up wrapping her arms around his shoulders and kissing his cheek lightly.

"Thank you for your room Edward," she had chirped sweetly, "It really has the best view, you are already the best brother ever!"

After that, Alice was Edward's closest friend and confidant. They truly were siblings in all but blood, they understood each other in a way that no one else could understand them. Edward was the only one privy to the visions that flashed through Alice's mind and Alice was able to understand the way Edward felt about always knowing what people would say or how they would react, before they were even able to say or do anything. Alice was the first one that Edward opened up to about Bella, the first person he was able to withabout his heart ache and loneliness. Alice was sympathetic and a great comfort to him. They had a special relationship that none of us had with anyone else apart from our mates. They were truly brother and sister.

That was why I was surprised by the way Edward and Alice were behaving to towards each other. Alice was glaring at him, glaring. Edward refused to meet her gaze. I was certain that from the expression on her face, she was shouting expletives at him in her head.

"It is her!" she hissed suddenly and Edward finally levelled his gaze on her and they watched each other carefully, Alice turned to me, seating herself on the arm of the chair I sat on she grasped my shoulders in her little hands.

"You have to believe me Dad!" She cried, pouting her lips, her chin wobbled slightly, "You have to!"

I stared into her wide golden eyes as she looked at me pleadingly. I knew better than to disregard Alice's visions, what she saw almost always came to be. However I was a man of science and I knew that Isabella Swan, circa 1918, died of the spanish influenza. Her heart had stopped, her pulse could not be felt or heard. She certainly wasn't breathing. I was the one who wheeled her body to the morgue, who had examined her and wrote down her time of death. She_ had _been dead.

So how could Alice be right? I wanted to believe she was, I knew that despite how resistant Edward was he wanted her to be right as well. I looked over at him and he stared somberly at me and Alice.

"Alice," I said with a sigh looking over at my daughter, to us she was like the baby of our family, I hated to seem as though I did not believe in her, "I have faith in your visions dear one, but I just don't know how you can be right here. She is human, this girl, and it has been almost a century since Edward's Isabella passed away. What you suggest is quite literally impossible."

"Who are we to say what is impossible or not?" Alice asked looking frantically from Edward to me.

"Alice she is not one of us," I said calmly, "she is human and young, if she was the same Isabella she would be a very old woman by now."

"Don't you see?" Alice cried jumping up from the chair, "She is the same Isabella, and yes she is human but that's because she _did_ die in nineteen eighteen!"

Everyone in the room stared at Alice as she stood with her hands on her hips, her eyes fixed on Edward.

"I don't believe in that," he said after a long moment, I realised that they had been having a silent conversation.

"What don't you believe in Edward?" Esme asked tentatively, looking from one sibling to the other.

"Alice thinks that Isabella Swan is the reincarnation of my Bella," He said with an odd tone to his voice, "I don't believe in that, Bella is in heaven where she belongs."

"I bet you never used to believe in vampires either?" Alice said testily narrowing her eyes, "why are you so intent on making yourself miserable Edward? You finally have a chance to be truly happy and to make this family complete, she could be the tie that binds us all together, finally a whole!"

"She isn't Bella," Edward growled, "and you have no proof that she is either, all you see is us together, that doesn't mean anything and it will not happen, you are simply guessing."

"Guessing!" Alice almost shrieked, "Am I guessing that she looks just like her, guessing that she has the exact same name, guessing you just saw her today for the first time and you love her already?"

"I do not!" Edward thundered, drawing himself up to full height and towering over Alice who had drawn closer to him as she spoke. Jasper quickly positioned himself slightly behind Alice, no doubt feeling protective of his mate.

"I love no one but my Bella, no one else!" Edward shouted, "I never have and I never will!"

"How can you deny the truth so easily when it stares you in the face," Alice asked steadily in the coldest voice I had ever heard her use, "how can you stand there and call this a coincidence, it isn't, deny it all you want Edward Masen but I know you love her already and that's proof enough for me, she's your mate. She's your Isabella!"

With that Alice stormed out of the room and Jasper ran after her without looking back. The slamming of the front door behind them let us know they had left the house. The rest of us sat in silence as Edward stood in the centre of the room breathing heavily and trying to calm himself down.

"Edward," I said when he sank slowly back into his chair, "what will you do? Will you ignore Alice or will you give this all a chance?"

"I can't afford to give it chance," Edward said his voice cracking a little, his head was lowered completely, his hair blocking his face from view, "She can't be her, I know she can't, but if I let myself believe she is, just for a moment, I'll hurt so much more when I realise she isn't."

"I understand," I said nodding and while I thought Edward's decision was a wise one I worried for his heart. A part of me also questioned whether or not Alice's theory was completely inplausible. She was right of course, in that being what we are, we shouldn't be so quick to dismiss other supernatural phenomenoms. My years with the Volturi had taught me that much. Was reincarnation really possible?

"I think you're making the right decision Edward," Rosalie's voice brought me out of my thoughts, "both for the girl and for yourself. She's only seventeen Edward, you're letting her have a chance at a real life, she doesn't need vampires in it."

"Yes," he said softly, "I know, she deserves more, I know what you gave up, what all of us gave up because of this life, I won't bring her into this mess."

We all sat in silence for a moment. I kept my thoughts carefully concealed from Edward but I wanted to go and research reincarnation as soon as possible. If this girl was somehow Edward's Bella then she could make him happy, there was nothing I wanted more than that.

Edward stood quietly and moved towards the door.

"I'm going to apologise to Alice," he said a little guiltily, "I shouldn't have treated her that way."

I nodded and watched him leave the room. I sent a silent prayer to God when I knew he was too far away to hear me.

_'Please Lord, let her be the one he needs.'_

**And it's over and done! Wooh that has got my fingers cramped up people!**

**So tell me whatcha think plz! I need to know. Hopefully the next chapter should be out by next week, but I need your love and motivation to keep going, so please reveiw if you like it!**

**Ok thanks for reading!**

**Till the next...**


	5. You Don't Know Me

**Hi, sorry for the long wait! I've been very busy lately with school and literally have not had any time to write or do anything else fun. Anyway, thank you for your reviews, they really bring a smile to my face, each and every one is appreciated. I'm not above begging you to keep on reading and reviewing this story...I am serious, I will beg...**

**So like I said, I have been busy so I might be a little slow with the updating but I will try to write as much as possible and as often as I can, so updates might be sporadic. Don't be surprised if one pops up at 3 in the morning on a Tuesday or something like that. lol...Shouldn't stay up that late...**

**I know you're all eager to read this chapter, atleast...I hope you are, so I'm going to shut up and let you get on with it!**

Chapter 4

You Don't Know Me

The rest of the week past in all shades of dull grey and pale sickly blue. It wasn't because my school work didn't interest me or that I didn't make any friends. It was because Edward Cullen was ignoring me.

The day after our first encounter I had come to school eager to see him again, hoping that he could shed light on the strange connection I felt for him. The night before I had been restless, unable to sleep because of an odd tug on my heart, I wondered if it was pulling me to him. I wanted to know if we had met before, he seemed so familiar to me.

I had spent the whole morning anticipating lunch where I would see him again. But when I took my place at Jessica's table and glanced over at the Cullens and Hales he was facing away from me and he did not look my way once. I ate quietly, unable to keep my gaze from wandering to him for too long but he never met my eyes. He stared pointedly down at the tray on his table and picked at slice of pizza, never eating.

His other siblings didn't look over either, not like the day before. All of them had subdued expressions on their faces. Alice Cullen looked particularly upset. I wondered if something had happened to them all, something bad.

Jessica kept up a steady stream of chatter and gossip and I nodded and answered when recquired, which was not often. I tried to use her voice as a distraction. The fact that Edward was not looking at me was doing strange things to my heart, it was aching and I felt sad. I t was inconprehensible, the effect he was having on me and it only made me more sure that we had met before. Why else would I feel so strongly for him?

When lunch was over Edward and his family departed swiftly and gracefully, none of them spoke a word to each other. Mike walked me to Biology, his smile was a little too friendly and so was his behavior but I wasn't sure what to do about that and, noting my experience, I was probably reading him wrong. I hesitated by the door of the lab, Mike noticed and gave me a questioning look but I merely shook my head and smiled before stepping in. I was going to have to face him sometime.

Edward was there already. Sitting at our table at the back of the class, there was a opened book infront of him and he was staring at it. Staring, not reading. I could tell that he wasn't really concentrating on the words on the page, his posture was tense and defensive. I walked to my seat and Mike followed me continuing to talk about an upcoming trip to the beach that he was organising. Stood by me even when I sat, continuing to talk, ignoring Edward completely. I couldn't ignore him if I tried, I was hyper aware of his proximity, my skin tingled and my heart thumped and once more that feeling of relief and completeness washed over me.

"So what do you think?"

"Huh?" I realised that I had been tuning Mike out.

"About going with us," Mike said with a wide smile which fell a little at the look of confusion that was surely on my face.

"You know," he said shoving his hands in his pockets sheepishly, "to the beach...you can ride with me...I mean Jessica and the guys will be there too...but anyway...want to come?"

"Um..." was my brilliant response. Mike was looking at me expectantly and I bit my lip feeling unsure. Once again I was getting the feeling that he might like me and I didn't want to encourage him. On the other hand, it wasn't as though he had asked me out on a date. For the first time it seemed as though I was being invited into a group of people my own age. I shouldn't turn down the opportunity.

"Sure Mike," I said smiling at him, "I'll be there."

He beamed and I could swear I heard a low rumbling sound from my left. Just then though the bell rang and Mike, with one last wistful smile, walked away to sit at his own desk. I sighed and faced forward as Mr Banner walked into the room. He simply gave us an excercise to do from our text books but I was hardly paying attention. Next to me, Edward stared rigidly ahead, when we told what page to read he looked down at his book and wrote notes and answered questions silently. He didn't look at me. He didn't look at me at all. It was as if I wasn't there, as if he couldn't see me. I couldn't bring myself to speak. A pressure behind my eyes alerted me to the fact that I was about to cry. I snapped myself out of that immediately. It was absolutely ridiculous, all of it. Why was I letting this stranger have so much power over me? Why did I feel so much for him?

Once again, I was struck by the familiarity of his bone structure, the colour of his hair the way he sat and moved. But his eyes...his eyes were all wrong.

They were beautiful, it had to be said. Warm honeyed topaz in colour, as pure in as shimmering gold. They seemed wrong though, they were the one thing about him that I didn't know, the one thing that didn't seem familiar to me.

When the bell rang I realised that I had once again spent an entire lesson with my mind occupied with thoughts of Edward Cullen.

Cullen...

What was it about that name?

It seemed familiar as well but it didn't match Edward. It felt foreign to me, calling him Edward Cullen...

His name was Edward...

Edward...

"Bella?"

I looked up to find Mike staring down at me. The class was mostly empty and I had been staring into space, consumed with my thoughts, I hadn't even packed up my things. Mike walked with me to gym and this time I had to play. I hit about four people over the head with the volleyball, when I actually managed to get it over the net. The people on my side were more on the receiving ends of my flailing limbs and the fact that I was far too lumsy to be running around. I must have knocked into everyone atleast once.

My cheeks still painted a deep pink I walked into the parking lot after school. I had to go shopping for groceries. My Dad's kitchen was sorely lacking in anything but fish and bacon and eggs. As I started up my car and backed out of the parking space I couldn't help but notice the Cullens and the Hale twins getting into the nicest car in the lot, the shiny silver Volvo. I drove right past their car telling myself not to look. I couldn't help it.

I looked right at him as he slid into his seat. Unlike everyone else around who was looking towards my car as the source of the deafening rumble in the air, Edward once again looked away. He was ignoring me, I was sure of it. But why?

Once again I stifled the hurt and anguish welling up in me and made my way to the store. Charlie was in when I got home so after unpacking the groceries I made my way upstairs to check my email. Sure enough there were three messages from my mother waiting for me. I shook my head smiling as I began to type out a reply.

When Charlie got home I had dinner almost ready. We ate in a comfortable silence for the most part. Then, I think, Charlie felt the need to make a few stabs at conversation.

"So, uh, how's school?" he asked while cutting his steak, "made any friends yet?"

"I have a few classes with a girl called Jessica," I said, "And there's a boy called Mike who's really nice...everyone has been pretty welcoming."

Almost everyone...

"Oh, good, good," Charlie said swallowing and taking a sip from his glass.

"Er...Dad?" I said hesitantly, "Do you know the Cullen family?"

"Dr Cullen's family?" Charlie asked, "Sure I do, everyone does, Dr Cullen's a great doctor."

I nodded, spearing a pea with my fork.

"Why do you ask?" Charlie said looking at me.

"Oh, it's just, the kids...they seem a little different," I blushed slightly, "I mean...they don't seem to fit in very well at school."

Charlie scowled.

"People in the town," he said testily, "Dr Cullen is an outstanding surgeon who could work at any hospital in the world and make three times the salary he's making here! We're lucky to have him in this little town. Just because he and his family are newcomers everyone's ready to talk. It's the one thing that really gets to me about the people here."

I was surprised by how strongly Charlie felt about the subject.

"I don't see why they don't fit in at school, I guess they keep to themselves, they're all very good looking," I finished feeling my cheeks heat slightly as I thought about one of them in particular.

That night I fell asleep quickly but once again my sleep was restless and light. The rest of the week passed in a similar way. I got used to my routine and my classes and grew a little closer to Jessica and a few other people at school, though I kept Mike at a little distance. In Gym people quickly learned to keep me out of the game as much as possible and to only pick me for their team if I was the last choice.

Edward Cullen was definitely ignoring me.

Everyday it just got worse and worse to swallow. I had to admit to myself that I was hurt but most of all I was confused. What had I ever done to him? It wasn't even the same behavior he showed towards the other students outside his family, he acted towards me with a definite coolness and distance it was obvious that he was doing it purposefully. Every time he averted his eyes from me I felt my heart break.

So my first week in Forks ended with a sombre note. I tried to cheer myself up over the weekend, I searched for a good bookstore and had a look in the local library, the selection there was dismal but they did have a few classics which I borrowed. There was nothing like sinking into the complicated lives of nineteenth century English ladies, it really took my mind off my own life and its complications. I got used to the sound of the rain by then, it actually was becoming quite relaxing to me. It lulled me to sleep at night, once it wasn't raining too heavily.

On Monday morning I was greeted warmly by Jessica and a group of her friends in the parking lot. I took in their relatively light jackets and felt self concious for an instant in my thick parka and scarf, however an icy wind blew by in that instant and everyone shuddered. I adjusted my scarf more snuggly around my neck. I wasn't worrying about looking trendy when it was frigid outside.

Mike sat at my desk in English. He positioned his chair close to mine. Very close. The teacher had us doing a pairs excercise and Mike sometimes leant in, 'to look at our next book', so close to me that I could feel his breath on my neck. I cringed inwardly and tried to put as much space between us as possible.

After class Mike insisted on walking me to Spanish even though I insisted he shouldn't. I didn't want to seem too pushy or ungrateful so I eventually agreed. As soon as we stepped out of class I noticed that the wind wasn't as biting as it was before, then I noticed white fluffy bits of snow swirling down from the sky and accumulating on the ground which was already taking on a white appearance.

Next to me Mike grinned.

"It's snowing," he commented cheerfully.

I nodded fighting the urge to point that I did have eyes of my own. Honestly, I was grateful for his kindness but he was beginning to annoy me.

"I guess it's finally too cold for rain," I said wrinkling my nose.

"You don't like snow?" Mike asked incredulously as though he could not imagine the thought.

"No," I said plainly, "I definitely don't, if it's snowing it means it's cold."

A ball of the white fluff appeared out of the blue and smacked into the back of Mike's head. He jumped and spun around. Both of us noticed Eric Yorkie striding away quickly, his back decidedly turned to us. Mike's eyes narrowed and I watched him sink down to gather some snow in his hand.

"Urgh..." I said inching away, "I'll just be going then."

I took off as quickly as I could without injury.

Jessica, along with the rest of the Forks High population, seemed to love the snow.

"Can you believe it?" She'd gushed excitedly as soon as I took my seat in class, "It's so early in the year for snow but it's such a great surprise, don't you think?"

I had made a sort of noncommittal noise but Jessica didn't seem to notice and she continued to chatter on, only stopping when Ms. Gonzalez uttered a sharp 'Silencio!'.

When Jessica and I walked to the cafeteria for lunch a Snow ball fight had already erupted across the grounds. I cowered, using by back pack and binder as improvised shields as I attempted to dodge the flying white balls of snow. Jessica laughed so hard she got a stitch in her side before we even made it to the cafeteria.

Mike met us as we got in line to buy food and Jessica quickly started up a conversation with him about how wonderful snow was, how fun, how great. They seemed to have a mutual love for it. Jessica kept fluttering her eyelashes at him. Interesting...

Out of habit, and also because I couldn't help myself, I looked over at the table at the farthest corner of the cafeteria. I expected to see what I had seen all of last week, they would all be sitting quietly, not eating at all and not talking to each other much. Edward would not look my way.

I was surprised. Instead of being greeted with an image of him staring distantly away from me, I saw him looking right at me. I was so surprised that I almost dropped my purse as I handed the Lunch lady my five dollars. Edward shot me a small smile. Barely a twitch of his lips and a soft softening of his eyes, but it was a smile none the less. I instantly felt warm, all the way to the tips of my toes and my entire day brightened entirely. I fought the urge to return his smile with a full blown grin of my own. Instead, I copied his tiny smile, barely curving the corner of my mouth. His eyes grew even softer and with one last glance at me he turned back to his family who had ignored our exchange completely. All except Alice Cullen, she was beaming at me. When she caught my eye she winked at me. I was beginning to think she was a little odd.

"Bella, you coming?"

I looked around to see Jessica and Mike staring at me curiously. I had zoned out completely once again, due to Edward.

"Er yeah," I said following them with my tray over to Mike's usual table. I obviously missed his invitation to join him and his friends there. Jessica was so pleased I thought she might burst. I began to contemplate the idea of somehow turning Mike's attentions to her, they wouldn't be wasted that way.

A conversation, once again revolving around snow, started up. I easily blended into the background as the others discussed their favourite winter activities. I tried to casually glance over at Edward again by gathering my hair over one shoulder as though it was bothering me. I flicked my eyes up. He was looking at me again, I felt my face pink with pleasure and cursed myself for being so pathetic. The expression on his face was searching, one of great curiosity. I wondered what he was looking for. His face was so serious.

He always over thought things, made things so much more complicated than they were.

I gasped slightly as the thought flashed through my mind. The feeling of overwhelming familiarity and longing stole over me again and I cast my eyes down and away from him. When I looked up again he was gone. I had remembered something again. An intense feeling of deja vu tickled my senses. I had said that to myself before or perhaps I had said it to him. Suddenly an image appeared in my mind.

_I was sitting on long deep green grass, my hands, folded in my lap, were clutching a small bouquet of daisies. I was twining them into a necklace on the white fabric of my apron. I got the distinct feeling that there was someone behind me._

_'Don't worry so much Edward,' I laughed delicately, still focused on my daisy chain, "You do make the simplest matters to be much more than they are!'_

I jolted as the memory faded away. It had certainly been a memory not just the workings of my imagination. But it had been a memory of something which I was sure had never happened to me. I had never been in such a field of dark long grass, making daisy chains and wearing a crisp white apron with ruffles at the hem. I was so confused, my breath was coming in short bursts as my head struggled to comprehend what I had just seen. Edward had been there too, in that field with me...

"Bella are you all right?" I heard Mike ask concernedly. I looked up to see everyone at the table staring at me worriedly. I must have looked a state.

"Yeah," I said blushing, "Yeah, I'm fine...Actually, my stomach feels a little upset...I don't think I can eat any more, I'll just go to class now."

"Oh," Mike said looking from his food to me as though contemplating what to choose, "I can walk you, I've got Bio next too."

"I remember," I said with a tight smile, "you don't have to do that, I'll be okay, see you guys later."

Jessica nodded at me and quickly pulled Mike back into conversation.

I made my way to the Biology lab in daze. I kept going over the strange memory in my head. I had seen it all through my own eyes, the field, the flowers, my hands working to knot their delicate stems together. I had heard my own voice say the words.

I sank into my seat in the lab and dropped my forehead to the table. I was surely going insane. All of this revolved around Edward Cullen, I was going to have to ask him about it. But how to start that conversation...

He'd think I was completely crazy.

I heard the school bell ring in the distance and brought my head off the table. He was the first person to enter the room. He glided in, his gait so smooth and graceful that it was almost like he floated a few inches above the ground. His eyes met mine in an intense stare, our eyes locked, he had ensnared me. He didn't blink, didn't look away for a second as he made his way over to our desk and took his seat. His topaz eyes were so focused on mine, once again I got the feeling that he was looking for something.

He only looked away, releasing me from his spell when other students began filing into the class room.

"Hello," he said in a clear musical voice. I almost gasped at the sound of it, it was like crushed velvet, smooth deep and slightly husky. I felt my face heat up. Even his voice was vaguely familiar. Thoughts of demanding answers from him fled me, he was far too good looking, I was unbelievably flustered.

"Hi," I said, my voice quivering nervously and a new wave of heat spread across my cheeks. He took a deep breath and an almost inaudible groan came from his lips. My breaths shuddered in my chest. He was glorious with his hair dripping wet from the snow and his face flushed, his full lips parted as he breathed deeply. I couldn't believe he was actually talking to me.

"I'm Edward Cullen," he said, "I didn't introduce myself last week, it was rude of me, will you accept my apologies?"

He was being very formal in both his choice of words and his inflection. It stung a little but I reminded myself that it was a step up from complete disregard.

"Thank you," I said meekly, "but I assure you, you needn't apologise, I'm sure you must've been quite busy last week."

I tried to be as formal as I could myself. I was surprised by how easily the words came.

He cracked a small smile.

"It is a pleasure to meet you, Bella Swan," he said almost amusedly. I stared at him in confusion.

"How do you know my name?" I asked wondering how he knew that I preferred Bella to Isabella. I had never spoken to him before and he didn't know me well enough to start coming up with pet names. How would he even guess that Bella was my nick name? It could have been Izzy.

He blinked at me and then his eyes narrowed slightly.

"Do you prefer Isabella?" he asked in an odd tone, almost like if my answer would reveal something very important.

"No," I said quickly, "It's just... I meant how did you know Bella was my nickname?"

He tilted his head to one side as he regarded me.

"I must've heard someone say that it was what you preferred," He said casually, "If I am wrong-"

"No," I said, "You're not."  
I twisted my hands awkwardly together. He was still looking at me like if I was some puzzle he was trying to solve. Thankfully Mr. Banner walked into the room carrying a huge box. I looked away from Edward reluctantly, trying to concentrate as Mr. Banner explained the lab we would be doing that day. It was an easy one, I had done it before. We would be working in pairs. Mr Banner shared out the slides and microscopes and ordered us to begin before sitting down behind his own large desk and shuffling through a pile of papers.

"Ladies first?" Edward asked gesturing to the microscope, he smiled a crooked grin so maginificently beautiful that I was temporarily stunned. His expression changed to concern.

"Are you alright?" He asked, "I could go first if you like."

"No, no, I'm fine," I said sure that I greatly resembled an overly ripe tomato by that point," I'll go."

I had to admit that I wanted to show off. Something about him made me desperate to be somehow impressive and interesting. I looked through the microscope and grinned.

"Prophase," I said confidently looking up and smiling brightly at him.

He smiled back at me almost tenderly.

"Do you mind?" He asked glancing at the microscope. I shook my head pushing it towards him. He reached out to pull it to him at the same time and his hand brushed mine. I couldn't help the shiver that ran down my spine. When his skin touched mine a feeling of absolute completeness and almost dizzying joy came over me and I sighed. His skin was as cold and smooth as ice. He jerked his hand back immediately, his eyes were wide and he stared down at my hand which hadn't moved at all. I wondered if he felt it too.

"Sorry," he muttered shaking his hand slightly, I merely shook my head in response as he pulled the microscope over to him and looked down the lens.

"Prophase," he agreed copying the answer on the work sheet before changing the slide and looking into the microscope again, "Anaphase."

"May I have a look?" I asked indifferently. He smirked pushing the microscope to me again. I looked into it hoping he was wrong so I could have the upper hand. He was right.

"Anaphase," I said nodding. He had already written his answer down. He handed me the third slide and I looked at it as quickly as possible.

"Interphase," I said passing it over to him before he even asked. He quickly wrote the answer down, clearly in agreement. We finished long before anyone else in the class. That left me with nothing to do but try not to stare at him, that was unbearably difficult, what with him being so beautiful and in such close distance. I also could feel his eyes on me, he was making no attempt not to stare. He must feel the weird connection between us too.

I faced him and we regarded each other silently. I still marveled over the familiarity of his face, we met before, I was sure of it. The only thing that bothered me were his eyes, they were the wrong colour...

"Did you get contacts?" I asked before I could stop myself. He looked taken aback.

"No," He said his eyes narrowing in curiosity.

"Really?" I asked feeling braver, "Have we met before? You look very familiar to me, it's just your eyes, I think they were a different colour..."

I trailed off realising that I sounded insane. His expression was one of surprise, he then looked pensive.

"No, I don't think we've met before," Edward said smoothly, he looked me right in the eye but his expression was blank. He was lying, I knew it.

It was my turn to narrow my eyes.

"Oh?" I said innocently, "my mistake, come to think of it...I'm sure I met someone called Edward before, he looked quite a bit like you, only his last name wasn't Cullen...?

I waited for his response. He didn't disappoint, he looked amazed. He knew what I was talking about, at least he knew something more than I did.

"That's odd," he said eventually his voice carefully controlled, "what colour were his eyes?"

I got the feeling again that my answer would mean a great deal.

"I can't remember," I admitted softly, "It's really starting to frustrate me."

Edward didn't say anything but his eyes never stopped searching my face. He looked just as frustrated as I felt.

Mr Banner came over to check our answers and finding nothing wrong he walked away looking disappointed.

"Great the snow, isn't it?" Edward commented after a few minutes of silence. He said it casually but a glean in his eye told me he was testing me.

"No actually," I said grimacing, "I hate it."

"You don't like the cold?"

"Or wet."

"Why come to Forks then?" He didn't say it maliciously, his voice held genuine curiosity and I couldn't help but reply honestly.

"My mom remarried and I wanted to give her a chance to travel around wit her husband," I said, "he plays baseball, minor league, he on tour at the moment. I was the only thing holding my mom back from going with him."

"You make yourself sound like a burden," He said frowning.

I blushed.

"So you sent yourself here so she could travel with her husband," Edward guessed, his tone unfathomable, "Even though you don't like it here?"

"Well, I also needed to spend some time with my Dad," I said a little defensively. I could almost feel his disapproval.

"Hmm, well, you are certainly very selfless," Edward said quietly, "I hope she appreciates that."

I definitely didn't like his tone.

"Why do you care whether I like it here or not?" I asked petulantly.

He smirked and I lost my train of thought.

"Am I annoying you Bella?" he asked amused.

I scowled and looked away from him.

"Not quite," I said dryly, "though I'm sure you're trying your best."

He let out a quiet chuckle and I recognised the sound with a sharp tug at my heart strings.

"Are you sure we haven't met before?" I asked again watching his face carefully.

He stared at me for a long intense moment then shook his head and looked away.

"No Bella," he said gently, "you don't know me."

I noticed his change in wording but didn't comment. I'd get him to own up to me sooner or later, he was definitely hiding something from me. I contemplated telling him about the memory but decided against it, there was no need to put it all out there immediately. I was sure that would prompt him to begin ignoring me again.

When the bell rang signalling th end of class Edward quickly stood, slinging his bag over one shoulder. He took one last long deep breath.

"Bye Bella," he said with a gentle smile before striding gracefully out the door.

**So, long chapter right?**

**Did it make up for my inappropriate absence?**

**Please let me know if you liked this chapter by hitting the review button at the bottom of your screen. Let me know what you think. PLEASE!**

**Yes I am pathetic and sad...**

**Till the next...**

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	6. His Eyes

Chapter 5

His Eyes

I once again found myself distracted and agitated by thoughts of Edward Cullen. I spent the rest of the afternoon thinking about him, going over his every expression, each tone in his voice, the way he moved...

I was still completely sure that I knew him from somewhere, that I'd met him a long time ago. However, that hunch of mine didn't explain why I felt like there was something distinctly, well there was no other word for it, _wrong_ with his appearance. His features almost looked too sharp, too perfect, and his skin was pale, pale as snow.

_And just as cold..._

I couldn't understand it but somehow I knew that Edward was lying to me. I didn't know why but I knew that he was. I also knew that it was extremely important for me to make him tell me the truth. Not only for my own mental health but also for the fact that when he had point blank denied the truth, my heart ached so badly it almost winded me. I longed for him.

I knew Edward, that was for certain, and I knew he was lying because the expression on his face when he said I didn't know him...It showed me all I needed to know. He was lying.

I walked out of school that day in a daze. My head was clouded and filled with thoughts of him, so much that I couldn't focus on anything else. I walked over to my truck and plunged my hand into my backpack to look for my keys, not really even paying attention to anything around me. I was vaguely aware of the sounds of people streaming out of the school, starting up their cars and calling out to their friends. All of a sudden I heard someone scream. My head whipped around in the direction of the sound only to see Edward standing in the far corner of the parking lot, his face a mask of terror, beside him his tiny sister. She was the one who had screamed.

I heard the screech of tires on asphalt and spun to face the other direction. Tyler Crowley was barreling towards me in his mini van, I could hear him yelling out the window but I was frozen. Tyler had lost control of the van and it was coming at me at full speed , the brakes rendered useless on the icy slick tar. I was unable to move, I closed my eyes and a pathetic whimper left my lips.

I prepared myself for the impact but there was really nothing going through my mind. No profound last thoughts or things I wished I had done, my short, and rather sad, life did not flash before my eyes, infact the only thing I could think of was the look Charlie would have on his face when he heard about this.

Suddenly, I felt the impact, but it wasn't Tyler's van. Something came out of no where, hitting into my side and forcing me to the ground. There was the loud screech of tires on asphalt and a dull metallic thud came from somewhere to my left, but it was as though I was hearing all of this through water. I slowly blinked my eyes opened and it was like I'd turned the volume up, all around me i could hear screams, someone was crying.

I looked up, somehow I already knew who I'd see there. Edward Cullen was there, his body crouched protectively over mine, his gaze unrelenting as he stared fiercely into my eyes. Tyler's van was leaning precariously towards us, sheilding us from everyone else. Edward's hand was pressed into the metal side of the van he was holding up and away from me.

My breath caught in my throat as I took in the scene. I looked back at my rescuer who was staring urgently at me.

"Are you alright?" he asked worriedly, his eyes were scanning my face.

It was the strangest thing but all of a sudden I got a feeling of deja vu. I remembered being in his arms like this, him looking down at me, his eyes soft and tender and so very very...

"Green," I murmered dazedly, squinting up at him.

His eyes widened.

"What?" he asked looking even more concerned.

"Your eyes Edward," I said in the same stupidly slurred voice, "why aren't they green? They're supposed to be green."

I tried to get up, to get a closer look at him, but he held me in place.

"Don't move," he said firmly but his expression seemed very perturbed, "I think you hit your head."

I continued to struggle fruitlessly for a moment before giving up with a sigh and leaning lazily into the hard but gentle cradle of his arms.

"Edward?" I breathed.

"Yes Bella," he said distractedly, he looked like he was listening to the scared voices around us.

"How did you save me?" I asked, "you were across the parking lot...you couldn't have run that fast...you run really fast but not that fast..."

I frowned in confusion, my head was spinning.

"I was right next to you Bella," Edward said slowly and confidently. If I didn't know better I would have believed him.

"No," I shook my head, "you weren't, you were all the way across the parking lot with your sister...I saw you..."

I heard the whir of a siren. The agitated voices grew louder.

"Hold on!" A loud male voice shouted, ringing in my ears, "we'll have you out sec!"

"Bella," Edward's voice refocused my attention on him, "I was right next to you."

There was a sort of quiet desperation in his voice and a firmness that could not be argued with, so I nodded slowly.

"Alright," I said said, feeling my head clear a little, "but you have to explain what happened later."

Edward looked frustrated for a moment, then his expression cleared and he nodded tersely. I once again marvelled at his golden eyes, I now knew that they were supposed to be green. I was sure of it, just as sure as I was that I knew him. However, I was now even more confused. I definitely didn't remember anything about him being super fast.

There was a loud crunching sound and the van was pulled away from where it leaned against my truck which, unsurprisingly, bore nothing more but a faint dent and a scratch. Before the paramedics descended on us I caught a glimpse of Tyler's van and the same could not be said for it. It was pretty banged up. I shuddered wondering how Tyler himself was doing.

It seemed as though in the blink of an eye I was strapped to a gurney and then Charlie was there looking frantic as I was lifted into the ambulance. Edward was no where to be seen. I closed my eyes again and when I opened them I was at the hospital. As I was wheeled through the gleaming white corridors the haze that had previously been clouding my mind seemed to have lifted. I tried to tell the nurse I was fine but she gave me a stern look as I tried to sit up so I decided to just deal with it for the time being.

I was wheeled into a room and moved onto a hospital bed. The nurse started asking me questions about how I felt and I kept repeating that I was absolutely fine.

"Alright then," the nurse said eyeing me, "a doctor will be along in a moment to examine you."

I nodded and shifted restlessly as she left. I wondered where Edward was, surely he had to be here too. I was desperately eager to question him.

After a few moments the door swung open again and a blond haired doctor entered the room, his head bent over a clip board as he walked towards my bed. Finally he looked up as he reached my side, presumedly to ask me some questions, but he was halted by my gasp.

"You!" I breathed in utter amazement, "Doctor Cullen...I know you!"

"I..." Dr. Cullen hesitated and nervously smoothed a hand over his perfectly coiffed blond hair.

"Don't lie to me," I pleaded desperately, "Edward has been, I know he has...This is why the name Cullen seemed so familiar to me...I've met you before somewhere...but Cullen isn't Edward's real name...Is it Doctor? He won't tell me anything!"

"Miss Swan...I'm not sure I'm the one with your answers," Dr Cullen sighed.

"But you must have some clue what's going on," I said, "you know me...Don't you?"

"I..." but whatever it was that the Doctor was going to say was cut off the sound of the door swinging open again.

Edward Cullen strided gracefully into the room and gave his father a meaningful hard stare. That when I noticed something else. Just like Edward's adopted siblings, his father shared the same pale skin, golden eyes and ethereal beauty. Even though I knew that they were not blood relatives it would not be a stretch to say that they were, they all looked so much alike. It was undeniably strange, especially since my mind was conjuring memories of a different Edward, a softer, more innocent looking one, with startling emerald eyes...

"Bella," Edward said jolting me from my thoughts.

"Yes?" I asked looking at him, unable to stop myself from scrutinising his every expression.

"How are you feeling?" He asked innocently, "I think you hit your head pretty hard when I pulled you out of the way."

I took note of his words.

_'hit your head...'_

_'_I _pulled you out of the way.'_

Was he trying to guilt trip me into accepting his story?

"I feel just fine," I said narrowing my eyes at him. I couldn't help but notice Dr. Cullen shooting Edward a questioning look. He seemed to ignore his father, instead focusing on me with his intense eyes.

"Are you sure about that?" He asked with a raised brow, "You were saying some strange things after your head hit the ground."

"Don't patronise me Edward," I snapped with a familiarity that surprised me and everyone else in the room.

Dr. Cullen looked between Edward and I for a moment, then seemed to make a decision.

"I need to check in on Tyler Crowly," He said moving towards the door, "Don't hesitate to call for me if you need anything Miss Swan."

And with that, he was gone, and it was just Edward and I. Alone.

We glared at eachother for an immeasurable time, both determined to make the other back down. Suddenly his face softened slightly and he sighed.

"Stop Bella," He said softly, "Please."

"I can't," I whispered, "I have to know, you have to tell me."

He shook his head slowly.

"Just do what's best for you and give up," He said turning on his heel to walk away.

"What's best for me," I repeated when he was half way to the door, he paused but didn't turn around, "since when is it up to you to decide what's best for me."

"Oh Bella," he sighed gently before he walked out. The doors swung silently closed behind him.

I wasn't sure if I had imagined the last whispered part of his statement.

_'Oh Bella, it always has been.'_

**Don't hate me for making you wait an age and a half for this! **

**I am an apologetic lump of sorryness and ask for forgiveness and...hopefully...reviews?**

**Thanks for still reading this, if you are, trust me after this point the story will branch off a bit more from canon. **

**Are you exceptionally clever people realising what Eddy's up to yet?**

**Yes he's being his regular old self sacrificing idiot...but we still love him don't we?**

**Anyway if you want to leave me a nice review (I like fat ones, which are wordy and interesting, but a little bitty one will be loved just the same) then all you have to do is follow the arrow and click on the button.**

**Ciao Bellas...and er...Bellos...if you're there...**

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V


	7. Research

Chapter Five

Research

I switched on my computer and waited for it to boot up, tapping my fingers impatiently. It was about midnight but I couldn't sleep, not with my mind racing like it was. I had been tossing and turning for the past two hours and nothing would allow me to settle but this. I needed to try and figure out this mystery. I felt like it was consuming every inch of my body and soul, I coud rest until it was solved.

Finally, I was able to get on the internet. I stalled, thinking hard about what I was actually going to search for. I wasn't sure. I knew there was something different about Edward and his family, and I knew that I felt as though I had met Edward before, I knew that I felt something for him, something stronger than anything I had ever felt, since the first time I met him, and finally, today I met Dr. Cullen.

I remembered him too, no wonder the name 'Cullen' had seemed so familiar to me. In my head I could see him above me, looking down at me sadly, his lips moving but I couldn't hear the words. The memory was even more hazy than the one I'd had of Edward and I talking and it had a painful undercurrent to it, I got the feeling that something had been wrong with me.

With that, I typed in his name, 'Dr. Carlisle Cullen'. There was nothing forthcoming in the list of results, but as I scrolled through them I saw a link for a website about a man called Dr. David Carlisle, whose office was in Chicago. For some reason the mention of Chicago struck a meaningful chord in my memory. It was odd because I had never visited the windy city, I had never even really thought about it, but now, now I was certain it was an important piece in this puzzle.

I pulled out a sheet of paper from my drawer and wrote down what I knew so far:

_Dr. Carlisle Cullen- know him from somewhere, he won't admit it but didn't deny it either, he must be the reason why 'Cullen' sounded so familiar._

_Edward Cullen- definitely know him and he knows me too, no matter what he says. He thinks it would be better for me not to remember...*note to self* must look into that. His name is not really Cullen, it doesn't seem right, it used to be something else but I can't remember. His eyes were green before, how did they turn gold? Also, look into the fact that he can lift vans with his bare hands and is strong enough to dent metal with them too._

_Chicago- this city has something to do with everything, not sure how much or how little yet_.

I looked down at my list and felt a little silly for making it but writing things down had always helped me to better put them in perspective and perspective was exactly what I needed. I turned to face the computer screen again and typed in the word 'Chicago'. For once, it seemed, my computer actually managed to work quickly and the results for my search appeared on the screen.

I scrolled through them until I found one website which claimed it had a complete history of the city since it's founding. I knew absolutely nothing about Chicago so I figured that starting at the very beginning was probably the very best place to start. Randomly humming the tune to 'Doe a Dear...' from 'The Sound of Music' I clicked on the link and found myself on the web page.

It really was a complete history of Chicago and was very detailed. As I skimmed through the information, I looked for anything that would jolt my memory. It was only when I reached the section which dealt with the early 20th century that something struck me as important. There was, in bold, a few paragraphs talking about the 1918 Spanish Influenza pandemic. I paused there and stared. Two things resonated in my mind as important, one was the flu epidemic itself and the other was the year 1918.

"1918," I muttered, "What could be important about 1918?"

It was now September of 2005, so 1918 was was 87 years ago. I didn't understand why the year seemed so important, it was so long ago, before even my grandparents had been born. All I had previously known about 1918 was that it was the year that the World War 1 had ended. Now I knew that it was also the year of the Spanish influenza outbreak. I decided to do a little more research about that before attempting to get some sleep.

My search engine provided me with 441,000 results I clicked on the first one. It listed dates, death rates, 50- 100 million people died worldwide, and there were numerous eerie black and white pictures of victims, mourning family members and helpless doctors and nurses. There was nothing that could be done, they didn't understand much about viruses back then, it was actually better to have a weaker immune system because the stronger yours was then the more the virus caused your body to ravage itself. For this reason, mainly young adults, who had strong bodies died, not children or the elderly. This epidemic killed more people than the Black Plague, how had I never know any of this!

I was growing increasingly distressed, the more I read. I felt emotional, as though the people in the photos were people I'd known or cared for, I felt sympathetic to them. The list of the symtoms of the flu caused a chill to creep up my spine, bleeding from the ears and nose, vomiting and coughing up blooding, brain frying fevers...By the end of all my reading I was feeling sick to the stomach and decided I'd had enough for one night. Before logging off the computer I added the Spanish Influenza to my list of clues. I was definitely important and the reason why was playing at the edge of my memories, dangling tantalisingly just out of reach.

That night I had a dream, well, I say it was a dream but once again, it was much more like a very faded memory and this time it was even more faded around the edges than usual.

_I was lying in a bed, the sheets were scratchy, uncomfortably hard against my tender skin. I felt as though I had been hit by a car, the way my body ached. Everything was out of focus, the air was stingingly cold and my head was throbbing. I realised that I couldn't breathe properly, the sound of my wheezing breath rattling in my lungs was all I could hear. _

_Without knowing why I turned to my left. There lying asleep, looking ashen grey and sickly, was Edward. The sight of him wavered before me as I coughed thickly, my throat aching. I felt so weak, so tired. Edward's bed was pushed close to mine, so close we could almost touch, I tried to reach his fingers but I simply could not summon the energy to move. There was a flash of movement above me and I looked to see Dr. Cullen standing by bed. His golden hair almost glowing in the dim light of the room, I had to squint as I looked at him. I heard myself speak, I didn't recognise my own voice, it was so hoarse and cracked, but I instinctually knew it was me._

_"I am going to die tonight."_

_Dr. Cullen's face grew sad._

_"Don't speak so Isabella," he said, "you have been so hopeful all this while."_

_"Yes," I agreed wearily, "but now I know I can no longer hide from reality, I will die here Doctor, I know this now."_

_"What of your Edward?" Dr. Cullen asked, nodding his head toward's the next bed, "Will you not hang on just a little longer for him?"_

_"I can't" I said softly, "I've been trying but now...it is my time, I must go. My body can't take any more of this, but Doctor?"_

_"Yes my dear girl?"_

_"You must do what you can to save Edward," I stated, "I know there is something you can do," I broke off coughing violently, speckles of blood flew onto my pillow staining it. Dr. Cullen rushed forward but I shook my head._

_"Promise me Doctor!" I choked out, "Promise me, you must do all in your power to save my Edward!"_

_"I promise," Dr. Cullen said, his eyes heartbreakingly sad._

_"Good," I closed my eyes, my chest felt tight, there was an intense pain in my stomach, I was gasping now my breathing laboured, "it's the only way you see...the only way..."_

I woke with a start. The dim light of dawn was just filtering through my curtains and the house was still and silent. Inside I was reeling. What I had just seen, what I had felt...it had to be real. It had been too vivid to simply be a dream. I had...Died, that night. I had been dying, I remembered what it felt like. I shuddered, a cold clammy feeling settled in the pit of my stomach.

Edward, he had been with me...

I begged Dr. Cullen, beautiful, pale, otherworldly Dr. Cullen, to save him...

And now Edward looks like him. He hadn't in my dream, he'd been softer and darker, even in illness. had done something to him, but what?

Had Edward died like I had?

Or did Dr. Cullen somehow save him like asked?

I ran a hand through my hair and flopped back down onto my bed. Of course, the real question was that if I had died of Spanish Influenza in 1918, how was it that I was alive right now?

I had a lot more research to do.

Yeah, so this chapter is short and there's no Eddie in it...sorry. But I wanted to give you guys something after having to wait soooooo long. I hope you are all still reading because I've not given up on this fic, it's just that I'm so busy these days that I don't get a chance to write. Anyway...Plz review and let me know if you liked this chappie anyway.

Til the next...


	8. Confrontation and Reply

**Hi! So...I've been gone forever haven't I? Yes I have.**

**I am so sorry because I understand how annoying it is when someone hasn't updated their fic in an age and a half! You're probably thinking 'Ugh she must've forgotten all about us!'**

**Well...I haven't. This story will not be abandoned. I'm just extremely busy at the moment. I have exams coming up so I've got loads and loads of important work to be doing. Anyway, despite that, I've managed to find myself with a few hour free in which to write this chapter. It may be short, just to warn you. **

**Then again, it might not be, let's just see how it plays out...**

**Anyhoo without further crap, I'll let you get on with it!**

Chapter 7

Confrontation and Reply

I got to school particularly early that morning. I wanted to be there when Edward arrived so that I could get an uninterrupted moment with him before the hassle of school began. I leaned up against my truck, drawing my jacket tighter around my body. It was a chilly morning though it had definitely warmed up since yesterday. I glanced up at the sky, the sky was still shrouded by the pale grey clouds typical of Forks. I breathed out a sigh and I saw my breath faintly mist infront of me. Where was Edward? It was cold and I wanted to get inside.

Just when I was about to give up on waiting, just to get out of the cold, I saw Edward's shiny silver Volvo swing into the parking lot. I shrugged my bag onto my shoulder and started forward. Emmett and Rosalie exited the car first. Emmett didn't look at me but Rosalie cast me a piercing stare that shocked me to a standstill. I shivered slightly as she turned away, sweeping her silvery curls over her shoulder, brushing it off as a reaction to the weather.

Jasper stepped out next, his honey blonde hair shining even in the dim light. He reached out a hand to help out his girlfriend, Alice. She caught my eye as she linked her arm with Jasper's and winked, nodding her head slightly as they walked towards the school. Her behaviour confused me entirely. What was that supposed to mean?

It didn't escape my notice that none of the Cullens apart from Edward and Carlisle were familiar to me at all. Carlisle in particular looked just as I seemed to 'remember' him. In my strange dream the night before, Carlisle had looked just as impossibly handsome as he had yesterday in the hospital, exactly the same, right down to his amber eyes. Edward on the other hand was different. I knew, atleast in my heart, that his eyes were supposed to be green, his hair less vibrant, his jaw more gently rounded and his skin less pale. What had happened to him? And what did Dr. Cullen have to do with it?

As soon as Edward stepped out of the car, I bounded forward.

"Hey!" I called as he slung his backpack over his shoulder gracefully, "Can I talk to you for a minute?"

He regarded me for a long moment. A memory once again sparked in my mind. This time it was more of an overwhelming feeling of understanding and familiarity. I knew Edward, I knew him very well. So well that at this very moment I could practically see the wheels in his mind turning as he battled with whether or not to talk to me. He always over thought things, my Edward. He finally smiled tightly.

"I doubt very much," He said slowly, "that whatever it is you have to say will take simply a minute, but I will take this time to remind you that I shall not speak with you about the matter in which I saved your life yesterday."

I scowled at him. "Well then, " I said testily, "it's a good thing that that is not what I wish to speak with you about."

Edward nodded calmly but clenched his jaw. I could tell his interest was piqued.

"Could we speak in private?" I breathed, cheeks flushing, all of a sudden I grew nervous. The car park was still generally empty. Most people had, if they were at school already, gone inside. Still, I wanted privacy if I was going to ask him the questions I wanted to.

Cocking his head questioningly, Edward nevertheless walked around the the passenger side door to his car and opened it, tilting his head for me to enter. I did, settling in to the soft leather seats and breathing in the concentrated heady perfume that seemed to surround him. When he too was seated in the car I took a deep breath steeling myself. Edward was staring at me, patiently waiting for me to begin, a vaguely concerned expression marred his face.

"I've..." I started then paused and turned to look at him properly.

"I had a dream last night," I said softly to him, searching his eyes, "of you and I."

Edwards eyes widened slightly and he raked a hand through his hair (I knew him to do that, somehow, when he was anxious).

I kept my eyes on him when I said, "We were in a hospital Edward, only, it was the most crowded...strange hospital I had ever seen."

"You were in the hospital yesterday," Edward said placatingly, "That no doubt triggered this-"

"No, wait," I said quickly, "let me finish!"

He conceded hesitantly and I sighed.

"We were sick," I said softly, "both of us, so very, very sick. I felt it as though I was right there...Right then...it was the worse thing I've ever...I mean, I knew that...that I was going to die..."

I felt myself get emotional. Somehow, last night, I had kept my tears at bay until this moment when it all hit me.

"I felt myself die," I said numbly, tears sliding down my face as I stared blankly ahead of me. A low moan by my side snapped me out of my paralysis. Edward was looking at me, his face set in an expression of overwhelming sorrow.

"Please don't Bella," He said, "Stop, please. Please."

I shook my head. I couldn't. I would never stop.

"You were there next to me Edward," I said, " and you were so sick, but I was worse, and I knew that there was a chance for you...I don't know how I knew it but..." I frowned, this was where it got very blurry, I didn't know Dr. Cullen's role in all of this but I knew he had something to do with it.

"What...What did Dr. Cullen do to you Edward?" I asked shaking my head, "Why are you so pale, hard and fast? Why aren't your eyes green anymore? Green like...like your mother's...Elizabeth..Oh my..."

A wave of nausea threatened to take over as images flooded my mind. Images of a beautiful auburn headed woman, whose sparkling green eyes lit up when she saw me. A woman who I loved like a mother and who loved me like a daughter. A woman who I had watched weaken before my very eyes. I stifled a sob as the last memory played out of a nurse wheeling a body away to the morgue, reddish brown curls still visable from under the sheet.

"Bella!" A rough shake that almost rattled my teeth caused me to look up at Edward. His panicked face was blurry and indistinct through my tears. I realised I had been hyperventilating.

"Edward she d-died," I said stupidly through hiccoughing sobs, "I d-died too didn't I? B-but h-how...h-how am I still h-here? What... h-happened to me Edward? I... d-don't... understand!"

Then, somehow, I was on his lap without realising how I had gotten there and he was rocking me and cooing to me and stroking my hair, telling me it would be alright. But it wouldn't be alright. Not until he told me what was going on.

"Please Edward please," I whispered into his marble hard neck. I heard his groan and felt his indecision as he held me in his arms.

"Bella," he said, "why won't you just trust me when I say that it is better that you don't know."

"Because it's not a matter of trust Edward," I said sitting up as I regained control of my breathing, "It's a matter of my sanity. Why can't you just tell me?"

Edward used his fingers to wipe away the tears from my cheeks and then he framed my face in his hands gently. His golden eyes were almost molten in their tenderness and warmth.

"Bella...I don't understand most of it myself, trust me when I say that, " he waited for me to nod before continuing, "and the rest? Well if I told you the rest...You'd be in so much danger my love...too much, I couldn't do that to you. Don't you see? I have to protect you, I couldn't then-"

He stopped abrubtly as he realised he had said more than he meant to.

"So you admit it then?" I asked, rather than the demanding tone I was going for, my voice sounded small and timid, "you admit that you know me and I know you?"

There was a long pause wherein I stared at him and he stared at me, both of us unsure of what to say next, what to do next. Slowly he nodded.

"Yes Bella, I know you."

My heart leapt and my spirit sang even as I sighed in relief.

"And both of us, we died in 1918?" I asked feeling completely ridiculous to have said that outloud. However Edward did not look at me as though I were crazy, he merely frowned slightly.

"Yes and No."

"What does that mean?" I asked, confused by his cryptic answer.

"I'm afraid that's all I can say," Edward swept a stray strand of hair out of my face.

"What?" I gasped, "but I need to know! You can't just-"

"Yes I can," He said firmly, silencing me, and something in his tone made me shut up, "we've got to get to class, we'll talk later."

"But-"

"Later Bella."

He helped me out of the car and the cold air immediately stung my damp cheeks. I raised my hand to my face feeling self conscience.

"You don't look like you've been crying," Edward assured me as he locked his car. He had my school bag slung over his shoulder and I went to take it from him, however at the last second a long dormant instinct kicked in and held me back. Suddenly I understood all the little chivalrous gestures that I had once scoffed at. Women often complained that men didn't respect them but failed to see it when one special guy actually did. Chivalry wasn't about degrading us it was about making us feel special and taken care of. Edward was being a real man and I liked it.

"What now?" I asked as the school bell rang.

"I don't know Bella," he said, "I just don't know, but trust me when I say that I will keep you safe. No matter what happens."

I nodded. I did trust him. I always had.

**Okey Dokey. lol**

**Anyway, did you like it?**

**Is it waaay too short for your liking? It is isn't it?**

**Sorry people! But still please try to ignore the awful typos that I am sure exist in the above chapter and give me a review. I'm begging you. Seriously how sad huh? I just want to know that people are still reading. Oh and for those who reviewed the last chapter, I didn't send you any PMs due to my hectic life but I thank you kindly!**

**Anyway... till the next! (whenever that will be)**


	9. Tell Me No Lies

**I'm Back!**

**Don't be to angry with me for taking so long. I really couldn't help it. I've been literally swampe with my studies so...**

**Anyway, I'll keep on rambling if I don't stop myself and I know you all just want to read. Just wanted to say one last thing, if I didn't reply to your review I'm sorry! Like I said before I've been swamped with exams and the like but trust me, every single review is read and appreciated and I want you all to know that reading your reviews gives me the inspiration to continue this story. **

**Feeling a bit emotional now...must be that time of the month...anyway...**

**Let's get on with it!**

Chapter 8

Tell Me No Lies

When the bell signaling the end of the school day finally rang I felt as though a weight had been lifted off of me. Edward had said we would talk 'later' and I was taking that to mean 'after school'. I certainly didn't want to wait any longer to find out the truth. Throughout the day I kept getting random flashes of memories, they were hazy and jumbled and most of them were too vague to make any sense but I knew now that things were coming back to me, slowly but surely I was starting to remember. I just needed Edward to fill in the blanks.

As I stepped into the car park I was surprised to see Edward standing by my truck. He looked ridiculous standing next to my old, rusty red truck. The contrast between the two was laughable. Especially with him looking so uncomfortably stiff and haughty. As I drew nearer he met my eyes and came closer.

"Is there anywhere we can talk," he paused and his eyes darted over to where his siblings stood across the car park, "privately."

I was momentarily stunned but quickly recovered. "Um, my Dad doesn't come home till around six, sometimes later," I said hesitantly for some reason, "you could come over."

Edward nodded once and regarded me seriously.

"Listen to me Bella," He said firmly, "I'll try to answer some of your questions, but know this, there are some things which you will ask me that I cannot answer. Not now, not ever. Do you understand?"

I looked up at him. His face was all at once severe and gentle. He was trying to protect me from something, but what?

"Yes," I said softly, "I understand."

Edward nodded again. "Good," he said and looked away, he took a deep breath, "I'll be at your house in less than half an hour."

With that he passed me, striding across the car park in his smooth graceful gait to where his siblings waited clustered around the silver car. I sighed and opened up the door to the truck. I clambered in, dumping my school bag on the passenger seat and starting up the engine. With the usual ruckus I backed out of the parking space and left Forks High behind me, more eager than ever to be home from school.

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I was sitting wringing my hands waiting for Edward to arrive. Once home, I'd quickly freshened up a bit, brushing my hair and teeth and making sure I still smelled nice. Since there was still time left to spare I put the kettle on and brought out the remainders of a plate of cookies I'd made a few days earlier. I wanted to be able to offer Edward something if he was hungry, although, come to think of it, I'd never actually seen him eat. Yet another thing to add to the mystery that was 'Edward Cullen'. _My_ Edward loved his food...

Instantly I was pummelled by a vision of Edward devouring a piece of pie which I knew, somehow, that I had made for him. The vision was tinged with deep amusement but also a great sense of pride and love. Yes I loved to have Edward eat the food I had prepared for him, I wanted to take care of him, to make him happy and pleased with me, to know that he enjoyed my food filled me with pride...

The memory, already flickering like a dying candle in my mind, faded away to with the the sound of the door bell. Instantly my breath quickened and my heart pounded in my chest. Was I finally to get the answers I desired or would Edward put me off like he usually did? I suppressed my nerves and walked steadily to the front door, taking a deep breath, I opened it.

Edward stood there in all his dazzling glory, pale skin gleaming, amber eyes molten and alluring and his tousled bronze hair slightly damp from the drizzle outside. The same drizzle that caused his t-shirt to cling temptingly on his lithe but toned frame, teasing me with the barest suggestion of a muscular torso.

"Hi," I said a little too breathily and promptly blushed with embarassment.

Edward chuckled lightly and his eyes danced with amusement. He seemed more light hearted than I had ever witnessed him being. Except in my faint, distant memories of course, he was a lot more jolly back then.

"Hello Bella," His velvety voice washed over me, and I sighed under my breath. He was too gorgeous to be allowed, honestly, now that he was being all...delicious...I could barely think!

"Erm...so...c-c-come in," I finally managed to say, stepping out of the doorway.

He chuckled again as he came into the house, smiling at me warmly though he avoided touching me at all. I led him to the living room where I'd set out the cookies on the the coffee table. I gestured for him to sit but I remained standing awkwardly.

"Can I get you anything?" I asked nervously, "Tea, coffee? I put the kettle on...should be done by now actually, I'll just go chec-"

"Bella sit," Edward cut me off gently.

I slowly sank down onto the sofa, next to him, close enough that I could feel my body react to his presence like it always did, energy crackling along the length of my body. I swear my heart was doing ninety knots.

"Calm down Bella," Edward said soothingly, "Don't be so nervous, I'm fine, let's just...talk."

I nodded and faced him. He was looking down at me concernedly, slowly he brought a hand up to smooth a tendril of hair away from my face.

"Oh Bella," he almost whispered, "I don't know where to begin."

"Why don't I ask you some questions," I said and continued quickly when he opened his mouth, "I know you can't answer everything, and I'd like to know why, but I just want you to answer whatever you can, please Edward, your silence on this...It's been killing me."

He looked down at his lap.

"I'm sorry Bella," He said genuinely sounding so, "but please believe me when I say that I have only denied you the truth for your safety, it is also for that reason that I cannot answer some of the questions which I know you will ask me now, if you know the truth about me...it would place you in im measureable danger."

"Danger?" I asked confused, "danger of what?"

But Edward was already shaking his head. I had already asked an unanswerable question.

"Alright, I suppose I'd like to start with a question about me, well, about us," I said tentatively, Edward's eyes rose to meet mine, "This morning you said that you knew me, back then, well I'd like to know, well, to have it confirmed I suppose..." I was rambling, "I mean, what I want to know is, what were we to eachother Edward?"

He gaze never faltered as he took my left hand in his. "You were my fiance," he answered calmly and quietly.

I gasped although it really was not so great a shock. I knew I had loved him deeply back then, I also knew that, to some extent, and I really had avoided delving into just how much, I still loved him now.

"We loved eachother," it wasn't really a question but he answered it anyway.

"Yes Bella, to me the sun rose and fell with you," he said just as calmly but as meaningfully as he had spoken before.

His hand still had not left mine and my palm tingled where it met his. Unconsciously, I had moved my hand so that our fingers were now entwined. I revelled in the feeling.

"I knew," I said, "I knew as soon as I saw you that I had loved you..."

He said nothing just smiled at me softly but with a touch of melancholy in his eyes.

"Edward, there's something I don't quite understand," I said slowly and he nodded for me to continue.

"I had a memory you see," I said, "and in it, I felt myself, well, die...If I died back then, well, how can I be here now?"

Edward was silent for a long moment. So silent that I almost assumed that I had asked one of his unanswerables and had been about to ask another question when he finally spoke.

"Trust that I'm being complete honest when I say that I have no idea," he said fervently, "we've been trying to figure it out you see, my family and I, but everything's so completely shrouded in mystery, and I always thought it was a bunch of nonsense anyway, except now I'm not so sure..."

"Edward what are you saying?" I asked confused.

"Alice thinks that you might be the reincarnation of well Bella, my Bella," he said almost wistfully, "Carlisle's been exploring other theories, he thinks that you came back, that you are the very same Isabella I loved, and you came back for me."

"What's the difference?"

"Well, to tell you the truth, there isn't much difference...Well, there is, but it's very subtle. You see, people who claim they have been reincarnated usually simply have flashes of memories, or certain personality traits of the person whom they are the reincarnation of. They don't usually look exactly the same or behave exactly the same as that person. They certainly don't usually have the same name."

"I see," I said, although in reality I was still completely baffled, "But if I wasn't reincarnated then...what happened?"

The most surprising thing happened then. Edward ducked his head and smiled shyly at our entwined hands.

"No one knows for sure," he said softly, "but I like to think that you were reborn again because you saw, up in heaven, that I was lost without you."

"Oh Edward," I sighed my heart twanged painfully for him. I bent my head to press a gentle kiss to his hand and I heard a stifled gasp come from him. Suddenly a thought occured to me.

"Edward, what happened to you?" I asked him, "you didn't die in that hospital did you? how have you stayed alive all these years? And why are you so...different?"

"Bella...I can't" He said bitterly, "I'm sorry, love, I just can't."

"I understand," I sighed although I really didn't. There was a long silence then, permeated only by the sound of us breathing and the ticking of the clock above the mantle.

"Anymore questions for me," Edward asked after a while, using his other hand to tilt my chin up so that my eyes could meet his. His were once again warm and tender, almost playful. I had a feeling that his mood swings were not a product of whatever had changed him, indeed I seemed to remember he had always been that way.

I smiled back at him and inched closer. "Just one more, for the moment," I said moving closer so that our faces were mere inches apart, "Edward what is your name, your real name?"

He grinned. "You knew me by the last name 'Masen'," he said, "Edward Masen."

And it was like the opening of flood gates.

**Hehe, cliffy!**

**Sorry 'bout that! Leave me a little review and the next chapter just might be out quicker than this one was. Trust me, your reviews honestly do help!**

**Anyway, love yas!**

**Til the next!**


	10. My Heart Within You

**Hi! So, once again, long wait for this chapter. Sorry. I went away for a few weeks you see and didn't have much time to use the computer and even less time to write. Anyway, I felt the need to write this chapter, it was calling to me, and also I had a feeling you lot were in need of some more BxE fluff. I'm gonna give it to ya with a side dish of angst, confusion and pain though so be prepared.**

**Ok, without further ado...**

**Let's get on with it!**

Chapter 9

My Heart Within You

I was bombarded by an entire lifetime of images, memories of a different time, a different life, a different me. Yet, it was my life I was remembering. It was like the thick veil that had once obscured a part of my mind had been drawn back and suddenly I was seeing clearly for the first time.

I remembered a time of innocence and joy and prosperity. It seemed so far away and yet so close to me. I remembered the house I had once lived in and the school I had once attended. I saw the faces of people I had once known appear as if before my very eyes and the face at the forefront of my mind was Edward's.

Edward.

Edward Masen.

My Edward.

Yes, that was his name. I remembered him saying it to me when we had first met. I had tripped in the street and he had caught me in his arms. I remembered his eyes smiling down at me. His beautiful, sparkling green eyes. Eyes that were the exact same colour and shape as his mother's.

Elizabeth.

Oh Elizabeth.

I felt tears sting my eyes as memories of her filled my head. She had been the kindest woman I had ever known. She treated me as if I was her own daughter. I remembered her sipping tea and chatting to me about her day. It was through watching her that I learnt how to be a proper lady, and just what being a lady truly meant. I remembered her getting sick and I remembered her dying.

I choked on a sob.

"Bella, Bella what's wrong?" I heard Edward asked worriedly, his cool hands pulled me closer and smoothed over my hair gently.

"She died," I whispered blankly, "I loved her so much and she...She's gone. She's been gone for so long now."

"Bella, who-?"

"Your mother," I said tearfully, "sorry, it's just all so fresh for me. It's all coming back to me now and it's too much all at once. I can't take it!"

Edward took a firm grasp of my trembling form and shook me slightly, anchoring me to the present.

"Take deep breaths," he said seriously, "try to calm down. Try to focus on one thing at a time and block out all else. Carlisle worried this might happen if something managed to trigger your memories."

I took deep shuddering breaths and tried to focus on the tingling sensation that I felt as Edward's soothing hands caressed the bare flesh of my arms. However, that too was familiar. I had experienced it before. I was overwhelmed by my love for him now. It was like a tangible force that surounded me, pushing me towards him. Before, my mind and body had hinted at this feeling but now it was unleashed and unrestrained and I had no power over it. He was my life now.

"Edward," I breathed softly.

He looked into my eyes, bringing a hand up to cup my cheek. "Yes?"

"I love you," I said without shame because it was true. I did love him and I felt compelled to let him know that I did. His face became clouded with emotion. His jaw clenched and he squeezed his eyes shut tight.

"I love you too," he said huskily and tucked his face into my neck, "I love you so much Bella. I missed you so much. I was nothing without you, nothing."

It was my turn to soothe him as he shook against me. I was almost certain he was crying, but I felt no moisture on the skin of my neck.

"Shh," I cooed gently running my hands through his silky soft hair, "It's alright my love, we are together now. We'll figure this out together, you and me. Nothing will come between us again."

I felt him shake his head. "No," he pulled away to look my in the eye, "I will never be parted from you again. I can't lose you again. Nothing could keep me sane if that happened. Not even a promise."

"You did keep your promise," I said smiling as a new memory blossomed, "you lived, you went on."

"Yes, for you," Edward pressed his forehead against mine, "I felt as if the entire world had ended but somehow I still lived, completely alone. I wanted to die without you here with me. I thought death had to be a kinder fate than life without you. But I had made you a promise and I had to keep it."

"I had a feeling you know," I said burying my hands in his hair and inhaling his sweet scent, "I had feeling I would see you again. Nothing can part us Edward, not even death."

He hummed his agreement as his eyes roved over my face hungrily, yet he held himself back, as though he were a man lost in the desert for months who had unexpectedly stumbled across an oasis but dared not approach it lest it turned out to be a mirage.

"Kiss me Edward," I whispered, unable to take it any longer as his eyes lingered on my mouth.

He groaned loudly and then I was being kissed with a passion that set my body and soul aflame. He was gentle with me, almost too careful, but I could feel his love, his desire, in the way his mouth, cool and sweet, moved over mine. His kiss both heart warmingly familiar and excitingly unfamiliar as I remembered his honeyed warm breath washing over my lips all those years ago.

But now his lips were as cold and hard as the rest of him, yet they still caressed my own with a tenderness that brought tears to my eyes. His hands, tangled in my hair, moulding me to his body, were likewise gentle yet I felt the tense desperation trembling in his body and I longed for him to let go. Slowly I moved my hands up and down his back, massaging his rock hard shoulders, running my blunt nails down his neck. He released my mouth momentarily as he groaned and I took the opportunity to lean forward pepper soft open mouthed kisses along his jaw until I reached his ear.

"I love you Edward," I breathed.

He moaned softly, and pushed me gently back so that he was looking down at me, lying on the couch with my hair fanning out around my head.

"You are so beautiful Bella," He whispered, leaning down to kiss my forehead, "so tempting. You always were."

I grinned. "Kiss me again, please?"

And he did.

oOo

Later he lay next to me on the couch, stroking my hair as I smiled lazily up at him.

"You're so different," I remarked casually as I studied his face, "yet you're the same, why is that?"

He frowned slightly and his hand stilled.

"I went through something," He said hesitantly, carefully slow, "a sort of... change. I am different both on the outside and in, in all matters except those related to you. Where you are concerned, I am the same, I loved you with all I am then and I still love you, just as deeply, now."

I sat up. Bringing my hand up to cup his cheek, I stared into his golden eyes.

"I know you love me Edward," I said steadily, "but I want you to know you can trust me too, whatever secret you are keeping if you told me it I would never speak a word of it to another."

"If it were a matter of trust I would have told you already," Edward muttered, running a hand through his already tousled hair in frustration, "though, I must admit, the thought that what I am will frighten you... that terrifies me."

"Frighten me?" I asked nonplussed, "You could never frighten me Edward."

"Oh, but I could," He said wide eyed with regret, " and what is worse is that even if I didn't scare you away, the consequences of what I told you would put your life at stake. You see, it isn't just my secret I must keep."

"Your family-?"

"And others like us."

I regarded him for a long moment even as he avoided meeting my eyes. Eventually I used my hand to turn his face towards me.

"What if," I started calmly, "what if I figured it out on my own?"

"I wish you wouldn't try," Edward said in a hopeful tone.

"I need to know Edward," I said wrapping my arms around his neck, "I need to know what happened to you. Do you remember that day, when we first met, and you insisted on walking me home and making sure I was alright, even though I had never really fallen at all because you caught me? Remember how we talked to eachother that day, I told you basically everything about me on that walk to my house, because from the moment I looked into your eyes I knew I was yours forever. It feels like that now, only I need to know _you_ Edward. I need to know what you are because it's a part of you, an important part, and if I'm going to be yours I need you to be mine."

He stared at me for a long moment as though stunned.

"I_ am _yours Bella," He said in disbelief, "All this time I've been wasting away without you, I felt as though half of me had died with you, it had...Every beat of your heart I count as mine because without that sound, without your heart, I am dead. I am yours Bella, please believe me. I'm only trying to keep you safe."

"I know that Edward," I said suddenly ashamed of what I had suggested, "I'm sorry. It's just, I need to know."

He nodded gravely.

"I understand," he said softly, then looked at me with stern eyes, "but you need to listen to me, if you do find out what I am, no matter your reaction, you can never tell anyone. I will leave you alone forever if that is what you wish, but you must never reveal what you know. If you do, I will attempt to keep you safe at all costs, but I would not be able to for long. Do you understand?"

"Yes," I said casting my eyes down, "I understand and I promise Edward, I would never tell anyone."

He nodded and looked away. An awkward tension built between us.

"Edward," I whispered desperately.

He looked at me, his jaw clenched and his eyes aflame.

"I would never leave you," I vowed solemnly.

He chuckled bitterly.

"Don't make promises you can't keep, love," he murmered.

"I _will _keep this one," I said firmly.

"Then stay alive alright," he growled, "don't put yourself in danger. I told you before Bella, I can't lose you again. I won't have it!"

"I'm not expecting you to," I countered, "I'm not a masochist Edward, I don't want to get myself killed and I certainly don't want to suffer the pain of never seeing you again. What I want is for there to be no secrets between us. I understand that you can't tell me the truth but don't prevent me from seeking it out."

Edward looked at me briefly, before nodding his head.

"Fine, I won't prevent you from looking for answers," he conceded, "I do understand your curiousity, I just want you to be safe."

"I know that," I said softly and crawled onto his lap where he cradled me in his arms, "and I love that you want to take care of me. You make me feel safe Edward."

I felt him smile against my cheek as he pressed kisses there and along my neck.

"I should go," he said reluctantly, "Your father will be home soon and I don't think now's the time to introduce us."

I laughed lightly and shook my head.

"No, we should probably get reaquainted with eachother first shouldn't we?" I teased tugging lightly on his hair.

"Hmm," Edward groaned before prising me gently away from him , "yes, I certainly think so. Now, be good, I need to go. I'll see you tomorrow alright?"

I nodded disappointedly and followed him to the door.

"Just one more thing Bella," he said taking my hand as I let him out and pressing it to my own chest, "from this moment on I need you to take good care of my heart, it's yours to keep for as long as you want it."

"Forever," I promised leaning up on tiptoe to press my lips to his.

**Ok peoples, what do ya think?**

**Ok, just a note on what just happened. Yes, Bella has remembered alot of what occurred in the previous life she shared with Edward. However, she has not remembered everything. There are somethings which remain cloudy to her and somethings which she will remember gradually or when influenced by a trigger. Edward will also help to fill in some of the gaps in her memory.**

**Hope you liked it!**

**Leave me a review, please!**

**Alrighty, til the next!**


	11. Elizabeth

**Hello mon petit pals! Er, you might not actually be small, but I do think of you as pals. Especially if you keep leaving me luuuurvely reviews!**

**Thank you! Thank you!**

**Now, unto more unpleasant matters. I have currently been experiencing a terrible thing called writers block. I seem to be getting the symptoms of said disease whenever I think about any of my fics, except for 'Whatever Happens' (I seem to be alright with that). The point is, that is why I haven't updated this fic in donkey years. I just couldn't summon up the inspiration or any muse like things...or whatever...**

**However, at last, I managed to get an idea. I'm not claiming it is a brilliant one, but it is one nonetheless. So I began to write this chapter. My warning is, it is quite short, and you will probably be very confused, but such is life right? **

**Now, after all that, I think what we really need to do is...just get on with it!**

Chapter 10

Elizabeth

_I was in Edward's house, I was sure of it. Yes, it had to be. The scent of cigar smoke, whiskey and perfume hung in the air. Familiar scents. I was in a darkened hall way though. I could barely see a thing. _

_Was it night time? _

_That maid, what was her name? _

_Abigail. _

_Oh yes, Abigail. She never remembered to turn on the lights in the hall. _

_Perhaps I should look for the switch. It used to be on the left wall, near the cloak stand where would hang his jacket and hat when he came in from work._

_I felt along the wall, it was smooth and cool to touch. I could see, in my mind's eye, the intricate floral patterned wallpaper. I had been there when had chosen it from a catalogue. She had asked my opinion on it and I liked it immediately. The green of the flowers' stems matched Edward's eyes._

_A soft tinkling laugh made me pause._

_I looked around. There was a crack of light filtering out from under a doorway across the hall. I stepped towards it and the door swung open. _

_I walked into a bright sunlit room, the sitting room, I realised. Fresh cut flowers filled the room with their lush scent. The scratchy sound of orchestral music came from the phonograph in the corner. _

_It was a familiar piece. _

_Mrs. Masen's favourite._

_"Come now Bella, won't you sit down?"_

_I whirled around. Sitting there in a rocking chair, wearing a starched white house dress was Edward's mother, Elizabeth Masen. _

_She was sipping tea and reading a book, 'Pride and Prejudice', her absolute favourite. The heroine's name was Elizabeth too._

_"I'm sorry," I said, "I didn't see you before."_

_She smiled as I took my seat, "Of course you didn't."_

_"It's so bright in here, it wasn't out in the hall," I said looking towards the now closed door._

_"It is always bright here," Elizabeth said happily, "but you must go through the dark to get here. That is always the way."_

_I nodded. "Where is ?" I asked._

_Elizabeth looked up from where she was pouring me tea. "He is at work, I expect," she said, "he always loved to work, don't you remember? I always preferred to be at home, with some hot tea and a good book."_

_"But don't you miss him?" I asked, taking the tea cup she offered me, "is he really at work so often?'_

_"I see him very often," Elizabeth said simply, "whenever I want to, in fact. And he always comes home to me."_

_"Oh, that's nice," I said and smiled, "but where is Edward? Is he at school?"_

_"Edward?" Elizabeth looked at me closely, "you know that Edward is not here with me. He is with you."_

_"How can he be with me?" I asked confused, "I am sitting right by you."_

_"No, you are not, not really," Elizabeth said in a gentle tone, "Edward needed you so you went to him. Your body is not truly here with me."_

_"Oh," I said, "but how?"_

_"There are many possible impossibilities, Isabella dear," Elizabeth said sagely then winked, "but you know that, don't you?"_

_I nodded. "I suppose I do," I said, "but can Edward come here too? Can you call him? You called me, didn't you?"_

_Elizabeth shook her head sadly. "Edward cannot come here now, he will not come for some time yet. It will be many ages till I see my son once more."_

_"That is awful," I gasped, "surely there is a way!"_

_"There is," Elizabeth said, "but it is only through you that it can be done. When you went back you took surplus with you. Edward must take it."_

_"Me?" I asked, "I don't remember. What did I take? What must I give?"_

_Suddenly, sunlight beamed through the window behind Elizabeth. It was so bright that I could barely stand to look at it._

_"Bella, I must go," Elizabeth said, the light seeming to cling to her like a second skin, "all will be revealed in due course. Give my love to my boy, my little Teddy."_

_"But wait!" I called as she seem to draw further and further away, "Is this real, or is it just a dream?"_

_Her tinkling laugh filled the room once more. "Can't it be both Bella darling?" She laughed, "can't it be both?"_

**Are you confused?**

**Or have you clever people sussed it out?**

**Let me know eh!**

**Till the next!**


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